Past. Present. Future? [Wattys 2015 ]

Chapter 10- My Cat Mister Snickerdoodel

Through the years I've learnt that  pain doesn't stop or dissappear but it hurts a little less with every step.

I've been tossing and turning the whole night and I couldn't catch  up on the sleep this morning (which isn't my definition of morning because morning is when the sun comes up  and not at 3:13 in the dark, on a Monday.  )

In a strange way I didn't feel anything towards Martin, not love nor hatred.  What he did to me was not right and maybe he deserved what he got.

No but no one deserves to suffer like that. I was no use lying in bed and driving myself insane,  coming up with crazy conclusions.

I need a run.

I got ready and the second I stepped out front door out of the blue I had this searing pain on the right side of my head.

That run wasn't gonna happen.

The house felt so cramped and stuffy I just sat on the porch bench.

The white wooden bench that held so much memories.  Some which I longed to remember.

My first kiss, first heartbreak, first steps and first picture of me with my Dad was taken here,  right on this white wooden bench.

My Dad once told that this was the first thing he and my mother built together,  when they moved here.

Gosh I miss her so much.

I looked out to the street. 

The long black tar road that went on and on whether you looked left or right.

The picture perfect suburban houses on this street always intrigued me. They held so much  mystery, on the outside they reflected happiness yet they held so much secrets .

The friendly old lady at house number 12.

She had a beautiful  big house with a red roof and door. 

Bigger garden filled with white daisies ,purple lilacs and  red roses.

Yet she probably had the biggest problems and sorrow ,  she lost her husband,  3 children and 6 grandchildren all at once in a horrific plane crash last year, only surviver of  the family.

Each and every house had the same suburban look but the sorrows and skeletons that the walls hide were the subjects they tried to hide.  

I didn't realize how cold it was until my cheeks felt a little numb.

In the corner of my right eye I saw someone running. I knew who it was.

Grey  hoodie, black track  pants and black running shoes.

He started  slowing down as he edged closer. I couldn't stop but stare. The way he ran,  the way his arms moved forward and backwards simultaneously with his opposite foot. Though that's how ones suppose to run he made it look,  like a thing of beauty. The way the wind picked up strands of dark brown hair.

The way his blue eyes  electrified me last time was undescribeable.

Suddenly Storm looks up and our eyes lock immediately. I then turned my head as fast as I could, probably a tad bit to fast. He definitely saw me staring. I looked down hoping he'd would just keep running. 

Then I went red when I saw two black shoes pointed directly to me.

"Shi" I stopped there before finishing the word.

I looked up and saw him looking at me with this grin on his face.

"Shitaque Mushroom, I like them too" he wittingly said . I looked at him puzzled as to how he got in.

"The fence is only waist high I could jump over easily " he stated a little breathless

"May I sit? " he asked.

I nodded.  Then there was silence,  only him trying to catch his breath. 

I guess he couldn't handle the silence when he asked me what I was doing here outside.

I explained everything to him.  "Are you okay now,  should I get you water, tablets anything" he said caringily. 

"I'm okay seriously but by the looks of  things I think you are unfit " I said .

"Oh really now, I could out run you any day, challenge created "he retorted.

I was not one to back down from a challenge so I accepted.

"Sorry about everything that happened the other night "  he said. "Especially trying to kiss you when you were so vulnerable it was wrong of me taking advantage " he explained.

I was saddened by what he said and I just sat there not looking at him.  Though that night it was wrong but since the truth came out about Martin and Kaylee I didn't feel guilty about looking at other guys .

I regretted the kiss not happening.

"It's okay  no probs all is forgiven "  I lied.

"I guess I should go get ready for school" I told him getting up.

He looked at his watch and said there is still three hours to get ready.

"I haven't fed my...  cat,  Mister Snickerdoodel, see you at school. " I added and walked in the house.

I felt guilty lying to him.  Yet I wasn't lying completely,  I do have  a cat, a stuffed animal cat which I named Mister Snickerdoodle.

¶

My dad took me to school and we made small talk.  It was the 26th January.
50  days to go.

I saw Cindy waiting for me this morning by the school gate. I expected her to.

I climbed out of the car and walked up to her.

"I'm so sorry I should've told you about Martin "  were the first words that came from her mouth.

"Yes you should've but you didn't and you kept this secret form and  that's not what friendship is Cindy ". I told her with tears starting to form. I turned  my back on her just when I was about to walk away she stopped me.

" No I'm sorry Rose it was a mistake.  I corrected mistake about not telling you about Martin and I can't live without my best friend. " I stopped and looked at Cindy .She was so sincere and I couldn't turn my back on her, on our friendship.

But I did...

I didn't know who Cindy was anymore she was a stranger to me now.

I walked away to scared to look at her.

When I played back what she said and how she said everything, four words sent a chill down my spine. They scared me .

" I corrected my mistake " .  What if she really did correct it.