BETWEEN US

Between Us- lap 45

Lap 💙45 Mark My Words

💙HUSSLE💙

We had made it to Houston  and to be honest I had no clue how this ish was gonna go. Me and Boog had rode on a lot of personal
Rollercoasters, but this ish was different....

I let Blacc walk in first, all the kids swarmed to him. I peeled off $300 everyone go get ice cream with Auntie Sammy and uncle Blacc

Yayyyyy all but Emani seemed hype for the excursion.  She was curled up under Boog.

Mani mon shoes on go with Auntie and Uncle.  She eyed me and says i don't want ice cream daddy i want to stay with mommy.

I need to speak with mommy in private Emani then you can snuggle with mommy.

Fine!

Boog says Emani come.

Emani's lip is poked all the way out.  Boog pulls her close kissed her forehead embracing her tightly and whispering in her ear.

Emani nods yes mama.  Lauren wipes her tears and kisses her cheeks.  She walks slowly and catches up to the others.

When the door closes I locked it and Lauren stands.

I rub my hand over my mouth! Lauren, next time  keep out of men's business.

💖excuse me?

Next time I tell you stay out of it, to back off STAY THE FUCC OUT MY ISH!  The shit that went down could have been avoided if we could have handled it earlier....

IM THE MAN IN THE RELATIONSHIP YOU FOLLOW MY LEAD.

💖So you saying this is my fault???

Exactly!!!

💖 wow un-fuccin-believable  me showing concern for the well being of my husband and brother in law  caused you to be late for the street politics!!!!

💖Tell you what Hussle... I give up, I won't interfere EVER AGAIN! Whatever happens, happens. I'll tell the kids daddy was a street legend.

💖Do me a favor grab a pen and write each of them a letter and tell them you love them before you can't!!!!

Boog scrambled around looking for her shoes and headed to the door. I blocked it.

💖HUSSLE MOVE💖

I don't but i see the rage flashing in her eyes.

💖GET THE FUCC OUT THE WAYYYYY!

There is banging on the door mommy!!!!! Let us in mommy!

I unlocked the door and the kids flooded into Lauren's arms.  She kissed each one and Emani looks worried.

Come here Mani mon come give daddy a hug.

NO why were you yelling at mommy???

The room is quiet and everyone is staring at me.

The rest of the trip is nothing like our normal family gatherings and we cut it short. Boog and i are parenting but not speaking.

Once we get back to Cali she slept in Emani's room.

I came and went as I pleased overseeing the renovation of the store.

Yo Hussle ...

What up Blacc you and Boog make up yet?

We good

Blacc says nicca and it don't feel like it  the vibe is off.

Let me worry about my house Blacc!

Blacc says of course brother.

We stayed at the store until 6:30pm and came home to  big dinner.

All the kids, mommy, Granny gran were at the table eating when walked in. There were 3 covered plates on the counter for myself and my siblings.

We speak and i kiss all my babies. I go wash my hand and eat the goodness my wife had created.

Sammy walks in and says ooh my sister in love put her foot in these dishes...

I wash my hands and cleared the table.

I head upstairs wash my hands and peek in the room.  She's in our bedroom folding my clothes.

She looks up  and says I'll be gone in a minute.

Take your time i head into the bathroom and see she cleaned that as well and the linens were refreshed.

I used the bathroom and washed my hands. When i came out she was gone.

I go down the hall to Emani's room and she isn't in there either. She's in the office cleaning. I stand in the doorway.  Can i take you on a date tonight.

💖She stops and says no thanks.

So are we going to be at odds forever.

💖No.

Then when are we going to make up.

💖We aren't fighting,Ermias.

It doesn't feel like it.  It feels like we just faking it in front of the kids.

💖Not at all.

Do you love me?

💖With all the breath in my body.

💖LAUREN💖

Hussle was driving me crazy because i stopped interacting in his affairs. See I've always been amazing following directions. He just wasn't tuned in because I'd always volunteered my assistance.

I backed out of volunteering . I stayed in most nights doing hair, cleaning, reading and playing with the kids...  i stayed out of the business affairs, away from the store.

When the kids were in school i worked out made sure my hair nails and mind was right.

I read but mostly was a homebody.

We hadn't had sex in months and i finally had gotten used to it. I didn't imagine what Hussle might be doing.

I hadn't asked his siblings or his mom.

I spoke to my therapist twice a week she told me i might be depressed or grieving my marriage. I didn't tell her each week I'd write Hussle a letter. I'd seal it, tuck them away in a sneaker box in our closet.

The letters made me feel better. Sometimes they were dark or funny and lighthearted.

I was merely existing.

I had an appointment today and when i came home i showered changed and made dinner. No one was home or do i thought.

Can i talk to you for a minute?  I look up and it's Blacc.

I say hey, what's up. Putting  the finishing touches on the potato salad

Blacc say no disrespect i tried to talk to Hussle but he said y'all cool. I know y'all and this ain't y'all what's up?

I close the fridge and say you're a great brother Samiel. So I'd never want you to have beef with your brother over me.

Blacc..lm...  i just want the two of you to be who you were again...

I nod thank you for that. I wish you an even sweeter love for yourself. I'm going to lay down. Dinner is done.

I was exhausted because i slept throughout the night into morning . Hussle was in the bed when i woke up.

Thank you for your time!