The English to my American // Dreamnotfound

Chapter Eleven

Dream's journal, October 3rd

It's me, Dream again. I haven't opened this journal for over a month now. I've been busy trying to adapt to my new living arrangements, here in England.

My school work has been a bit better, I'm not perfect around it and never will be. But I'm willing to try this time.

I met a boy. He is also my roommate, we share the dorm room. 

His name is George. 

He is short, has brown fluffy hair, his eyes are also brown, his face is pale and soft, his neck is slim, like a perfect match for my chin to perfectly fit between the crook of his neck and shoulder. And his lips are perfect. His eyelashes, god i'm jealous.

Over a week ago George asked me out on a date (it's not a lie, i promise). He first took me to a hillside that was covered in all sorts of flowers. It was so colourful there. I asked if he likes flowers, and he does and that it made him feel 'alive', like little things in his life make him feel that way.

After that I proceeded to get behind him and get the courage to pull him against my chest while also placing my head on his shoulder. It was a cute moment I like to think, nobody was around, just us together.

After that he took me to the London eye. He said it was too 'touristy' in his words but neither of us had been there ever.

He also got the champagne experience, now tell me it wasn't a date. He refused to admit that even after I noticed him blushing.

Then he stared at me while I was admiring the views of London. It made me feel nervous, but it soon was all okay. He asked me about my eye colour, trying to make sure it was indeed green.. didn't remember changing my eye colour. But soon learnt that George was colourblind.

Then we kissed, like kissed kissed, properly. It was the second time for me to kiss him, but for his privacy I'd rather not talk about the first time.

It felt different for me. It felt right.

I had never kissed a boy before, no, I've never made out with a boy.

he told me ''The English'' to which I replied ''To my American''. It was the first time I think that I felt butterflies roaming around my stomach.

After that moment we got caught, oopsies. The facial expression from the worker was priceless. We ran out there as fast as we could as George held my hand the whole time we ran through the rain.

And I thought only hollywood movies have that kind of stuff in it. Didn't think that actually happens in real life too.

And then he suggested we go to a party. He wanted to get drunk with me, which was sunday evening, we had classes the next day too. If you wonder, we did go anyway.

I still think of what happened at that party. We had intimate heat between us in some random bedroom in that expensive house.

No, we didn't have sex but he was giving me a proper blowjob. He was so gentle with it and always asked me if I was okay with this or that. Probably because he could see how anxious I was at first.

I think I've been feeling genuinely okay so far.

I haven't needed an escape in the form of crying.

For now, as long as I have George by my side I think that I will be just fine.

It's like the sun appeared from behind all those dark clouds that are usually fogging up my mind with every self-deprecation thought I had.

George was exactly that ray of sun for me.