alters

26

ALICE

I MELT into the crowd, gazing up at the dark engulfing smoke wafting from the blackened brick building. The fire has been extinguished, thankfully, but still clusters of black air race out of broken windows.

I spot Alex and hurry over to her side, the sounds of water spraying out of firefighter's hoses in my ears. She pivots slightly, then fully rotates when she sees me. ʻʻAlice!ʼʼ She exclaims, while wrapping her skinny, skeleton-like arms around my shoulders.

ʻʻAre you okay?ʼʼ I decide to ask. My mind is swimming with anxiety, questions that desperately need answers. Ever since I ran into that damned Harry Styles, I have had nothing but questions on my mind.

ʻʻIʼm okay, just really...I dunnoʼ...shocked? Surprised? I have this weird feeling inside my chest that I just canʼt put a label on,ʼʼ She explains, weaving her slender fingers through her short hair.

ʻʻAnd the man you sawーthere was only one right?ʼʼ I inquire, full of fear.

ʻʻyeah, only one, but a crap load of people are saying that they saw someone leaving the building before it caught fire. Theyʼre pretty sure it was the Two Time Killer.ʼʼ

ʻʻThe who?ʼʼ

ʻʻAlice. Are. You. Serious?ʼʼ She exhales in an exasperated sigh, shaking her head. ʻʻThe Two Time Killer. The serial killer that killed five people, including Luke, in the past month, all in the same town. But somehow he still hasnʼt been caught yet...Not ringing any bells?ʼʼ

Oh, wow. I guess that Iʼve been so absorbed with all of this crazy Harry nonsense, that Iʼve lost all connection to the things happening around me in the real world. I canʼt let my busy mind concentrate on things as trivial as societal chatter because of the British asshat. ʻʻOh yeah...that,ʼʼ I pretend to understand completely. Alex obviously doesnʼt buy my shit, but brushes the matter aside with a small conversation-transitioning laugh, that barely makes it past her lips.

Suddenly, I feel a strong hand grasp my shoulder, and a low, husky Irish accent breathe out my name. ʻʻAlice,ʼʼ Niall gasps as I quickly spin around. He looks flustered and almost frightened, his blue eyes bulging from his skull.

ʻʻWhatʼs wrong?ʼʼ I reach up to gently rest my cold fingers against his own shoulder, a form of comfort I discovered to very rarely be effective, but whatever.

His eyes dart from side to side, his front teeth biting down into his peach bottom lip. He then briskly proceeds to usher me away from the crowd, guiding me with my small hand in his large hold. We find a sanctuary in a dark alleyway, the far away hum of conversation continuing to drone on in the background. Niall exhales and briefly closes his eyes. ʻʻHarry lost it,ʼʼ he states.

ʻʻYeah, no shit.ʼʼ

ʻʻYou knew he did this?ʼʼ He questions, appalled. ʻʻDid Harry tell you? Have you seen him recently?ʼʼ

I raise my hands innocently. ʻʻNope, I just kinda...could tell, you know?ʼʼ

ʻʻWell, when a building just suddenly bursts into flames thereʼs only one person who comes to mind.ʼʼ He frowns and stares intently on the darkened crimson wall before him, pondering something. Finally, he speaks. ʻʻAlice...you know...that Harry and I canʼt stay here anymore.ʼʼ

Something inside me breaks, some unknown, unreasonable, stupid, and naive part of me experiences a great tear. I knew this would come sooner or later. ʻʻYes,ʼʼ I mutter under the shield of my breath.

ʻʻI donʼt know where Harry went---I havenʼt seen him since the fire, but I doubt he went far.ʼʼ He says to me, with a hint of exasperation in his voice.

ʻʻWhat if he left?ʼʼ I hate that my voice cracks when I say it.

ʻʻHe wouldnʼt have left without saying good bye. Iʼm sure heʼll swing by tonight at your apartment.ʼʼ He reassures me with a smile.

I know that I shouldnʼt long for someone like him to grant me one last good bye, that I shouldnʼt hope to see the forests inside his irises and to wrap my arms around his waist. I know that I shouldnʼt, but I do. I want to have him rest his chin on the top of my head and to embrace me from behind. We canʼt have that, though. And I am fully aware of what has to be done for his safety and the well being of the innocent civilians in this town.

Once I break from Niallʼs company, I head immediately towards my apartment building. I feel bony fingers grasp my forearm and yank me back before I manage to escape the fireʼs perimeter. ʻʻAlice! Where are you going?ʼʼ I turn to find Heather glaring at me, Alex quietly at her side.

I jerk myself from her grip and adjust my black jacket to fit more comfortably on my shoulders. ʻʻHome,ʼʼ I spit too sternly. I canʼt fathom why I would decide to take my anger towards Harry out on my best friend, but I do anyways. ʻʻYou know what? I am sick of you always acting like my fucking mother. Well, Heather, youʼre not! So can you just please leaves me alone!ʼʼ

Her vibrant aqua eyes widen, as if I just slapped her across her heavily makeup-ed face. I might as well have. She stays silent, even though I can feel the insults and retorts burning beneath her tongue. I canʼt stand what I am feeling at the moment, so I swiftly turn and run as fast as I can away from them. I run so fast and blindly that I nearly miss the entrance to my apartment buildingʼs parking lot.

I zoom carelessly through the lobby, ignoring the elevator and climbing up the many stairs to my room. In my haste and anxiety it takes me a good three tries to successfully unlock my door. I throw it open and enter, slamming it shut afterwards. I want to cry, I want to scream. I want to feel something other than all this confusion.

Should I hurt myself?

The though gently floats about my mind, but I shake it away, or at least try to. Hurting myself had always been an escape for me when life got too out of control. I would cut myself, burn myself, pinch myself; anything to keep my mind off of the world around me. I managed a year, a whole 365 days, plus some weeks without the distraction of self inflicted pain. I want that to stay, I want the pride and appreciation of myself to stay, but everything is just so out of control.

Harryʼs leaving. The only person who really understands anything at all.

Harry burned down a building, murdered half a dozen people, managed to make my life so unbearably miserable yet so unbearably fun.

When heʼs gone, what will I have left? I doubt Seth will ever talk to me again, along with the two friends I so eagerly left behind. Without the glue of Lucas Hemmingway the friendship Alex, Heather, and I had has fallen apart.

I sigh, unconsciously digging my fingernails into my upper arm, leaving traces of crescent marked indents in the pale skin. Stop it, Alice, stop. I clench my ebony hair in my hands, the room swaying about me. I have to leave, I have to escape. Whispers float around me, faces popping up, blinding me. Whatʼs happening? What is going on? Am I losing my mind?

Through the commotion of my mental state, one crisp voice breaks through the panic. ʻʻAlice.ʼʼ I freeze, only to discover the man I hate, the man I love, standing in my kitchen doorway.

I donʼt know whether to throw the glass vase beside me at him or to run into his arms.

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OMFG
THAT UPDATE TOOK FOREVER I DONT EVEN UNDERSTAND.
OKAY I WILL TRY TO WRITE QUICKER AND BETTER BECAUSE THIS STORIES KINDA GETTING MESSY BUT ITS WHATEVS.

Please vote and comment for the next chapter:)

Ali.