Whisky, Women and World

Chapter 18

I woke up in a single cart bed, my mind still foggy from the nightmare I had. Trying to remember where I was, I glanced at the clock to calculate how long I had been sleeping. My hair had been completely matted down from the pillow, and I could feel sticky saliva around my lips. After driving for an entire day, exhaustion has taken its toll. However, I had managed only four hours of sleep, yet it felt as if I had been slumbering for days.

Nights are a special kind of torture for me and nightmares are the main reason I struggle to get a good night's sleep. As soon as the sun sets, my heart races and my mind floods with anxious thoughts. I lay down in bed, trying to find a comfortable position, but it's never enough. Some nights, I try to write down the stories that haunt me, only to get stuck in the same scene, unable to move forward. Other nights, I imagine I'm painting the forests of my dreams in my mind's eye, and I almost feel like I'm there. Then there are those nights when I'm so restless and my mind is so active that I feel like running a marathon.

The thoughts swirling around in my head seemed incomprehensible. I wrote until early in the morning and when I put my pen down, I knew I would tear out these pages and throw them away, never wanting to see them again.

I stepped through the door, the cool night air brushing against my skin. It looked as if the tree branches danced in the moonlight against the dark sky. A soft drizzle filled the sky, painting a beautiful gray canvas. I lit the cigarette and the nicotine soothed my chest ache. Taking a deep breath, I realized that I had followed the address Kate had left on her seat before she departed from the car. The address led me to Thrissur, Kerala. I then let the gentle Kerala breeze caress me. This reminded me that it had been a day since I left Kate at the airport.

I tried to remember what happened the night before when I met Yaqoob and he handed me the keys to this room. It was dark and late, so I couldn't see his face. His house was next to mine, and it felt strange to think a family lived in a graveyard.

The cigarette smoke hung low in the air, slowly absorbed by the gentle rain. I tried to piece together the visuals from the nightmare I had just woken up from. It was a strange dream, one I couldn't understand. I tried to recall the details, sights and sounds. It felt like two distinct realities intertwined, with only a few scenes clear in my mind. I stared into the darkness, focusing my energy on the dream, and gradually the images became sharper.

I was sitting in a car in my first dream, though it didn't feel like mine. It was parked at the edge of a mountain covered with small green grass blades. The landscape in front of me was filled with magnificent buildings. It was a beautiful sight, and I was mesmerized by the scenery. I felt relaxed, as if I had been in this place for a long time. The car felt like a sanctuary, and I was content to stay and enjoy the view. I slowly turned to my left, leaned closer and kissed. The person's face was an enigma, shrouded in bandages, with only a small hollow opening at the mouth. In the midst of our passionate kiss, I noticed that the lips and skin were rough, as if they had been recently shaved.

The world was burning right in front of my eyes, yet there was no sound to be heard. It was as if the world had been attacked by a nuclear weapon. Buildings collapsed and erupted in massive gray smoke. However, the air inside the car was so still that it seemed like neither of us were part of this chaotic scene. All I could focus on were the lips of the person sitting next to me. I couldn't see much else, but I could tell it was a man.

I exhaled a deep puff of smoke as my dream pictures played out before my eyes. The weight of the dream was heavy, and I couldn't shake the feeling of unease it left me with. I lit another cigarette, trying to focus my attention on the other dream I had experienced. This dream felt different from the last, more tangible and more real.

It was a long road, lined with vast farmlands on either side. Not a single building was in sight, and yet the scenery was captivating; wheat fields, a wide muddy road, and the vast expanse of a clear blue sky. It was like a painting, still and silent. No human presence, no animals, just unearthly silence. The man quickly scrambled to his feet, clutching the papers to his chest. He looked confused and tired, with sweat beads on his forehead. He glanced around, his eyes searching for the source of the noise. Was it coming from me? I couldn't be sure. The sound of a large crowd grew louder and closer, as if they were running towards me. The man, or maybe it was me, seemed terrified, desperately trying to locate the noise source. I was frozen in fear, unable to move. In this moment, I realized it was my own body that felt foreign to me.