We don't talk about Jouno

What would Dazai do?

When Jouno awoke the next morning, there was someone new in the medical room. Someone he didn't overly like. Gogol, the mad jester, was lying unconscious in a hospital bed beside Jouno's. The monitor beeping above him told Jouno he was alive. Lucky for Gogol, not so much for Jouno.

"You're alive!" Came a very enthusiastic sounding voice. Jouno was greeted by a rib crushing hug that reminded him of something Tetchou would do, only stronger, almost. Jouno could remember the heartbeat, but he wasn't sure from where. He could make out that the voice sounded like that of a child, though.

"I'm sorry." Chuuya said, not sounding remotely apologetic. "Really, I did try to keep them all back." Sure he did. If Chuuya really wanted to, he could use his control over gravity to stick all the unwanted guests to the ceiling. "One at a time, people!" Teruko called out over the sound of multiple people talking. Jouno really didn't like the sound of that.

"I'll go first!" The same child said, very energetically. "You remember me, right?" Jouno hadn't the faintest clue who this guy was, but he seemed so thrilled Jouno was alive, he didn't want to burst the kid's bubble. "Totally." Jouno said, and hoped his lie wasn't obvious. "I helped Tetchou get you back." He said. "While you were a vampire, we tricked you by having Tetchou pretend to be dead, so you'd reform to bite him. Then I hit you over the head with a street sign." Jouno didn't know, and he didn't want to. He really didn't.

"Kenji." Came a familiar voice. "Let's spare him the details." Jouno recognized this person's voice immediately. "Kunikida." He said. One of the few people in the armed detective agency he actually liked. "Here." Kunikida said, slightly less grumpy than usual, and pressed something into Jouno's hand. "It's okay." Tetchou said from somewhere behind Jouno. "You can take it." Jouno did. "What is it?" He asked. "I brought you a pear."

There were very few things in life that could get Jouno to crack up, but he threw his head backwards and laughed. Jouno could sense the confusion of everyone else in the room, Tetchou included. "It's an inside joke." He whispered, and Tetchou nodded. Jouno would fill him in later.

"Is everyone done being nice to him?" Came a sharp, almost rude sounding voice. Once again, someone Jouno recognized. "Because I have half a mind to sue the pants off of you." The girl who Jouno had recruited. "Legally, you can't do that." Jouno said. "There's no way of proving the note came from me. I'm blind, remember? How could I possibly have passed you something written by hand on a small piece of paper? Besides, I'm a national hero back from the dead. I don't think you'll be winning in any court case."

Aya harrumphed. "Geez, buddy." She said. "You should learn to take a joke. I'm not going to actually take legal action against you. Even if I totally should, on multiple counts of child endangerment. You do realize I almost died on so many occasions, right?" Jouno shrugged. If she'd just stayed in the opposite room and caught the whole thing on film like he planned, that shouldn't have happened. "It seems like that was your fault."

Jouno was greeted with a punch to the shoulder. And not a light one either. "Just because I'm happy you're not dead, doesn't mean I'm not still mad at you." Aya said angrily. "You have no idea what you put me through." Jouno wanted to point out that once again, that was her own doing. No one forced Aya to follow Jouno. "Duly noted." He said, not wanting to cause further conflict.

"I brought food." An older sounding man. "From what Tachihara tells me about your fiancé, I'm sure you'll find it more edible than his usual cooking." Jouno tried to hide his snort of laughter. "Hirotsu, I'm guessing." The man nodded. "I'm surprised you're still on friendly terms." Hirotsu shrugged. "In my opinion, most of my friends aren't dead, and Tachihara played a big part in that. I feel I owe him a great debt." Jouno nodded politely, and took the small container of food. It smelled good, much better than what Tetchou would probably make. Jouno was grateful.