Sturniolo imagines

Sad - Chris

*This story's kinda from personal experience rn, I'm currently in an anxiety/depressive slump, idk what u call it but yeah, it sucks.. that's why I haven't written muchh*

TW: Anxiety and depression descriptions, slight talk of s*icidal thoughts

Desc: Chris is in a depressive slump (basically he stays in bed all day, has no energy, feels tired constantly) and Matt & nick help him.

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Chris' pov: 

I haven't felt great recently. The only time I leave my bed is to eat, then I just lay down. I haven't had energy for anything. I haven't been able to do any basic thins. I can't remember the last time I brushed my teeth or showered, and I haven't gotten changed in ages. I feel disgusting, but I don't have any energy to get up and do that stuff. I think nick and Matt have noticed though, they seem concerned, but I honestly don't care. I don't have the energy to care. "Chris, you need to hurry up, we have a video to film," Nick yells out. 

I groan as I drag myself out of bed, flinching as the light burns my eyes. I drag myself to the car. I feel bad not talking much in the video, but it was too much effort. I laid my head on the window and just stared. "Chris, are you okay? You seem down," Matt asked. "Yeah, I'm fine." I reply, not wanting to worry him. I didn't want to be a burden and add onto his or nick's problems. And they'll probably fine me dirty and gross, they'll probably make fun of me for not showering and stuff. I sigh. As soon as the video is over I go straight back to bed.

I stare at the ceiling and just wonder why I feel horrible. I just feel so tired.  Honestly, I don't feel like dying but I just don't want to exist, if that makes sense. It's just so exhausting. I'm interrupted by matt opening my door. "Chris, what's wrong?" He asks, walking over to my bed. I try to lie, "What do you mean? Nothings wrong.." I suck at lying. "Chris.. you can talk to me," matt looks worried. I sigh and finally explain to him how I've been feeling. It honestly felt great telling him, like a weight lifted off my shoulders. "Don't worry, I've been through that too, I know how much it sucks. You're not alone. We'll get through it, just please talk to me about it sooner in the future, it helps, trust me." Matt smiled. I smiled back, the first time in ages. I felt comforted, knowing Matt had been through the same as me, and that I wasn't alone. I knew then that I would be okay. 

* lmk if u have requests, feedback, etc!! Sorry it's a little short. If u need anyone to talk to btw, my dms r open! Just remember ur not alone!! ♥️