A/N: something short for now...
I woke up... sweating, panting, crying. From a dream.... More like a nightmare. I thought I'd forgotten the closure I needed. Turns out old wounds can open back up, if they still are scabbed...Some old wounds never truly heal, and bleed again at the slightest word, or in this case a date and time. Today was a reminder that I will never get a band-aid to close this wound. Until I realised I was in the arms of Katie McCabe. So I just lay there taking in the warmth, only to have the dream on replay in my head.
*Flashback to what happened in the dream*
"DAD!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. It was too late. Sitting there holding my lifeless father in my hands. Only for a few seconds, till I realized my little brother was also hurt. His cries were never endless. It felt like the whole world had stopped and stared. Like the universe didn't just start something. "Hey, Hey.... You're gonna be okay! Just breathe steady for me!" I say. "STAY WITH ME! PLEASE, PLEASE!" I yelled. Only moments later, his body was limp and faint. His chest didn't rise and fall. There he lay in my arms. Limp. Unalive. I finally got up and walked over to the woman's car. "HEY!" I shouted. The lady just lay there. Eyes wide open, mouth ajar. My eyes never left her.
That was until she disappeared. She turned into a ghost right in front of my eyes. I walked back to our car, only to see blood all over the floor. But no bodies. I slowly started to look around, and everything was gone. It was pitch black. So I ran and ran. Until I fell. twisting my ankle in the process. That's when I woke up.
*Out of a dream*
Laying there, scared. Millions of thoughts in my head. My heart pumps blood at a constant pace. Until I hear a soft voice speak out, and tighten her grip on me. "Hey, you okay?" Katie says."Yeah, I'm fine..." I say in a quiet manner because I'm not fine. I was terrified. The dream was only what I thought had happened. Then everyone disappeared because Thought Everyone was trying to leave me. Nothing in the dream was truly realistic, yet it still scared me. I wasn't even actually there to know what had happened. But you know what they say? The mind is a powerful place.
Fear of everyone leaving you can be an overwhelming and deeply emotional experience. It's like standing on the edge of a vast, empty abyss, constantly worrying that the people you care about most will one day disappear, leaving you isolated and alone. I'm haunted by mental images of the accident that I can never unsee. The sound of screeching tires and shattering glass echoes relentlessly in my mind. The sense of helplessness, knowing I couldn't be there to protect or comfort them, compounds the anguish. It's as though I carry their pain within me, the emotional scars etched deep, Leaving me with just things I think happened, Not the truth.
When I woke up fully, I checked my phone. The time is 8:30. The date below is...Wednesday July 27. I would never be officially over it. B U T W H Y. Why was it so hard for me to just let go? I went downstairs to a happy friend group. None of them knew what today was. I wasn't going to just go around telling everyone either. After we all finished eating breakfast, we were all out the door on our way to training.
Once we arrived, Katie knew something was off with me. I could just tell. But she didn't say anything. Until she found me in the gym working out intensely. " Hey you all good?" Katie said, afraid. "Yep" I popped my P and went over to the punching bag. I started punching hard, but slowly. "Did something happen? Did I do something wrong?" She spoke with worry and care. But I was just getting more upset as she talked. "No Katie, you didn't do anything." After a few moments of silence, I went back to punching the bag. This time not stopping, just rapid hits. My hands started bleeding and Katie noticed this. Instantly running behind me and grabbing me away from the bag. "What's wrong?! Please tell me! So I can help you!" Katie said in a stern voice. "Today is my dad's and brother's death anniversary."
In that moment, Katie realized that healing takes time and that sometimes, the deepest wounds are the hardest to share. She simply held Rylie, offering her a silent but comforting presence, understanding that words alone couldn't mend the shattered pieces of a grieving heart.
YOU ARE READING
Rough on the Pitch||Katie McCabe
ФанфикWhen Rylie Moore, Moves to arsenal with a bit of a reputation of sleeping with people at different clubs, Then choosing to run to another club when it gets too much. Not only does riley have a track recorded of sleeping with people, she Also is know...
