The Bully & The Nonbeliever <▪︎> Soukoku

Am I inlove... ~ NC

I wiped the blood off of his face softly, not knowing if there were wounds under it all. He stared at me, the reflection of the wall lights behind me lit up his cinnamon eyes, though they were so dull and lifeless.

When I had the blood cleaned up I thought for a moment, if I should warn him before disinfecting his wounds. I glanced at him before standing and disinfecting his wounds, I flinched when he winced but continued after, putting bandages over them. I had done the same to myself after Shichiro had thrown a rock at me and chased me down the hall, I didn't have a choice but to go to Dazais dorm, I had already passed mine not realizing it since I was in a panic. I sat back down, glaring at him for a moment as he stared back at me. The silence was peaceful, I found myself actually enjoying being around him. He smelled like his dorm and his dorm smelled like peppermint and Chocolate, and sometimes like wine.

"What happened...".
I mumbled, glancing at his hands, they were an even bigger bloody mess.

"I don't know...".
He responded, looking down, he looked like he really wasn't sure what happened, blinded by rage, is what I would call it. If he really was blinded by rage though, why would he be so mad about Shichiro hurting me? I thought he hated me just as much as I... hated... him..

"I couldn't really control myself... I was just so angry I guess...".
His voice was soft, it was kind of relaxing, like I could fall asleep to it.

I stayed silent, thinking about my feelings, I wasn't sure if I really did hate him anymore... we spent a few moments glancing at each other in silence, until the silence was broken by knocking, it was more like banging.

"Shirase...".
Dazai mumbled, I didn't understand how he knew if that was Shirase or not. But when he opened the door I was shook, how could he tell who is knocking? Does he know if its me when I'm knocking...?

"What do you want kid".
Dazai sighed, I couldn't help but chuckle at the nickname.

"Kid?! Shichiro could have died because of you! You do realize that right?!".
Shirase yelled, I started catching on now, Dazai and Shichiro probably fought.

"If he wasn't prepared for a fight then he shouldn't have done what he did to Chuuya".
Dazai glared, slamming the door in Shirases face.

"What, are we friends now?".
I asked, watching him as he sat down.

"If you want to be, but friends hug y'know~ and they are nice to each other".
Dazai smirked, flopping backwards and rolling onto his side, facing me. I thought for a moment, staring into his cinnamon red eyes.

"Okay".
I sighed, standing up and holding my arms out, glaring at him. He stood, wrapping his arms around me and resting his head on mine. I did the same except my face was buried in his chest. I took a small deep breath, he smelled like peppermint, chocolate, wine, and rain. Rain or I just smelled the rain from outside. I loved it, I wanted him to hold me forever. I'm not inlove with him though...... am I...?