Few More Reasons To Live

Chapter 23

Tanishka's pov

" Okk so my sister yeah listen -" with an embarrassment smile he continued his story while sitting next to me on the bed.

" its not ahhhhh how to start , okk my mother adopted a girl child but she changed , my mother changed after that , she never care about me after adopting her " he continuous
" you know she always pay attention to her and her only , I was ten when my father died and my mother adopted her , I am not jealous of her but upset with my mother for not giving me enough attention  and love ....... you know one night I was sick and having a very high fever my body was burning and my mother didn't even come to see me because she was busy treating my sisters damn hair fall  ,  I ,  her own son was fucking dying and all see care was my sisters falling  hair wow what a GREAT mother and I thought that she cares for me, love me I'll enjoy with my lil sister like other sister and brother bond but no a big fuck no  , nobody cares if I live or die they are just selfish , If  I'm  doing what they say fulfilling their all wishes after that also I am not enough I was never enough , after the arrival of her my mother totally forgot about me like they  both  eat together , enjoy together and they will spend time together and will totally forget about me and still they  both live together and still they just use me or need me for money nothing else ................     
 

I was hugging him as he buried his face in the crook of my neck and I am patiently listening to his story and swear my already broken heart's pieces broked more by listening his story he and I were of same age when we faced the tragedy of life ...... TEN ....... I was ten when I got kidnapped and my parents died . He was also TEN when when his father died and his mother adopted a girl and neglected him till now they don't care about him ........  I am still hugging him tightly more tightly I just feel like If  I release the hug he will break and will disappear , I didn't dare to break the hug but embrace him more tightly. He hugged me back and rested his head on my shoulder. 'We were silent just hugging each other while I patted his back , people don't always need advice.  Some times all they really need is  just  an ear to listen patiently what they want to say , a hand to hold them tightly , and a heart to understand them , adore them , feel them ' . 

After  some time he released the hug but I wanted it to last longer,,,,,,, but then I look at him and read the sadness , the pain , the Loneliness , the emptiness in his eyes , and for a moment I am afraid.........can he read mine ?? 

The way I can detect when they  lie , the way I can recognize their fake smile, the way I can tell if they are in pain or not just by looking at them , can they too tell all this about me  can they  ?????????????????????????? ................

"you try so hard not to hurt anyone , but why don't you care you are hurting yourself??           

you don't deserve this pain

You cannot make everyone think and feel as deeply as you do . This is your tragedy, because you understand them but they do not understand you and it's totally okk , see your mother stop loving it's not your fault maybe she has her own reason for this - "

" No no you are not understanding what I am saying amore  , they hated me , they never loved me , I am a misfortune a cruel monster , the devil for them she said I am cursed right on my face she hates me and look I didn't even know my fault . I tried every thing that was possible , but I was never enough-"

" You are more than enough mateo-"

" ohh my lil mouse , No word will be enough to tell you how much I wish I was more than  , just , almost enough   I changed everything about me , the way I talk , my dressing sense so that they can love me but no nothing was ever enough I was never enough for them , am I this much hard to love , I am tired of pretending that I don't feel or care that I strong , It's just too much every one just leaves me or be with me for money or power "