you feel like HOME

CHAPTER 2

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I ran...
 
I went to Yooyoo and she noticed that I seemed distressed. She asked if I was okay and her concern was evident in her voice.

"When is this going to be over?" I asked, hoping to escape from my soulmates. It was a thought I didn't expect to have so soon. "We can leave in a few minutes," she replied, checking her watch. "Are you sure you're alright?" I just nodded, anxiously waiting to leave. After that, the minutes felt like hours.

After about five minutes, the host announced the conclusion of the event, but I was still lost in thought, caught between what I wanted and what I knew was necessary. I didn't want to turn them down, but the weight of responsibility pressed on me. Their safety was in my hands, and that truth made every choice feel heavy. I couldn't afford to make the wrong decision.

I looked up to grab Yooyoo and pull her out of there. I took one last glance at them, my soulmates.

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I pulled Yooyoo away from the chaos, her brow furrowed in concern as she asked why I was so eager to escape. It was clear that her worry was mingled with frustration over my unexplained behavior. After a moment of hesitation, I admitted that I was feeling unwell and needed to go home. Without a second thought, she led me to her house, fully realizing that leaving me behind in that dismal place was not an option.

Throughout the entire ride, I found myself lost in the scenery, my eyes tracing the silhouettes of buildings that whizzed by. Each one sparked a whirlpool of thoughts about how I might evade Yooyoo and Hwang, determined to keep my soulmate concealed from their prying eyes. The weight of the impending revelation hung heavily over me, the fear of them discovering our bond gnawing at my resolve. 

As we arrived at Yooyoo's house, she wasted no time, directing me toward the room I had come to know as my own during my stays. I stepped inside, a mix of anxiety and anticipation coursing through me.

I just wanted to make one cut—just one—to release the stress, the tension, to feel something other than this crushing weight. In the quiet of the bathroom, I pulled a blade from my bag, rolled up my sleeve, and pressed it to my skin. One cut. The sting brought a strange, fleeting euphoria, like opening a pressure valve. But it wasn't enough. I made a few more, each one sharper, each one louder in my head.

As I sat on the toilet, the quiet turned heavy. I thought about my soulmates—the ones I could never have, the ones I could never confide in. My chest tightened with a spiral of doubts. What if they thought I was too thin? What if they recoiled at my scars? Would they hate me if they knew about that night? What if they didn't like me at all?

The blade sat in my hand, its edge a cruel whisper. In that moment, it felt like it understood me more than anyone ever could. And that thought scared me the most.

As I stepped out of the bathroom, I took a deep breath, trying to piece myself back together. The mirror's reflection still haunted me—eyes a little red, sleeves carefully adjusted, and an ache I couldn't quite hide. I'd been in there for over an hour, drowning in the storm of my thoughts, but the world outside hadn't stopped for me. Work was waiting, pulling me back to reality. Before I could go, though, I needed to let Yooyoo know.

"Hey, Yooyoo, I'm heading out now. I need to get to the café," I said, my voice quieter than I intended. It wavered, betraying me. Her eyes softened as she looked at me, concern clear in the way her brows knit together. "Are you sure you're okay? You can stay here if you need to rest," she offered gently, her words laced with care.

"I appreciate it, but I really need to go. I'm fine, honestly," I said, offering a smile that barely reached my eyes, turning just enough to show her I was holding it together.

As I made my way to the door, I heard her footsteps behind me. Yooyoo caught up just as I reached it. "Wait, let me drive you there,"she said, out of breath from her quick pace. "You look like you could use some company."

I couldn't help but smile at her kindness, a small flicker of warmth amidst the cold. I nodded, grateful for her unwavering concern, and agreed to her offer. As we walked to the car, I felt a quiet sense of relief, thankful for Yooyoo—someone who, despite everything, was always there when I needed her most.

We sang along to the radio, the melody filling the quiet space between us, and for a moment, I felt a weight lift. It was so comforting to have a friend, a sister, like Yooyoo by my side. I thought about how lucky I was to have both her and Hwang in my life, but beneath the warmth, a cold knot of guilt twisted in my stomach. I felt guilty for hiding the truth from them about my other relationships—relationships I could never truly have. There are people who are always there for me, but I know I can never be with them. I can only love them from a distance, admiring them quietly, secretly. I can't tell Yooyoo that the most handsome men in the world are my soulmates. The guilt eats at me, a quiet but constant ache.

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Bye for now! (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧

[After reviewing the chapters, I noticed a few errors that could affect the reading experience. To make sure readers get the best possible experience, I've decided to revise them. I hope these changes help you fully immerse in the story!]