Elmo x Reader: The Love Story Of A Lifetime

Chapter 1: Arson and Rubber Duckies

You were walking down Sesame Street. How did I even get here? You thought. All along the street were different multicolored monsters. A giant yellow bird stares at you and waggles his eyebrows before a fuzzy green trash creature began to street fight with him, little worms devouring the thing's arms and legs. You walk faster. A blue guy follows you. You spin around. "Can I HELP YOU?" you ask him. He grins. "I'm Groover, mah dude." he says cringily, and claps his hands. He begins to do the floss. You want to punch him in the face, but you resist and hide in a suspiciously dark alley. You breathe a sigh of relief. You wait a while, and a band of monsters walks by, screeching about Among Us and Fortnite. You love Fortnite. So you walk out and say hi. "Can I join you?" you say. The leader crosses her arms. She was tall with a giant pinata llama suit and a space hat. "Depends." she says very seriously. "U got that Fortnite battle pass?" You remember you just spent all your money before you came here on buying the Emoji Movie on all of your 19 devices.  "Uh... no?" The gang kicks you back into the alley. "We won't forget this..." the leader says in a dark voice. You are now very scared. Fortnite fan clubs were no laughing matter.  You decide to rent a house, because this is a very cliche story. You climb the side of a 35 story building, just like your mom taught you. And then you break the glass of an apartment window that looks only slightly emo. You step in, and immediately see a bunch of family paintings. You barricade the door, and throw the pictures out the window of the 110th floor. You open the bedroom door, and see a pile of rubber duckies. "Can I have some crack, mother?" they say in unison. It looked like you'd be sleeping with your eyes open tonight. And tomorrow. And possibly the rest of your life. Just then, there's a bang on the door. "I'M COMING MY CHILDREN!!" the person screams. You know you only have probably ten seconds before the creature comes in with an AK-47. Jeez, this story is so predictable. You think. You are halfway across the room, when the thing bursts in and begins shooting around violently. So out of natural instinct, you grab the convenient box of matches on the table that is right next to you, and set the house ablaze. You jump out the window, and somehow land unharmed on your feet. Rubber duckies bombard the sky like bombs, screeching about all a manner of drugs. Ah. You think. So this is what it feels like to commit arson. You feel a bubbly feeling inside. I just killed 969 innocent children. You think proudly.