Taylor Swift Imagines (GxG)

hate

TW// self-harm please do not read if this subject is triggering..

you and taylor had the best weekend. you spent time at her beautiful mansion in rhode island and had a little getaway. you spent time on the beach together and just enjoyed being together.  it was now monday, so that meant you were back in new york and taylor was back in the studio.

you were so bored and wished taylor was home with you. you decided that you would scroll instagram to cure your boredom. you were scrolling when all of the sudden you came across taylor's post where it was the pictures you took over the weekend. taylor captioned it: "i love spending time with the girl i love most❤️ @y/n.swift" you smiled at the pictures you took with taylor.

you decided to open the comments to see what people had to say. most of the comments were from fans who were talking about how cute you guys looked with eachother, the others not so much. this shocked you as you've never received hate like this before. some of the comments read: it looks like y/n gained weight; taylor deserves someone else rather than y/n; y/n and taylor are not a good fit; y/n is so ugly idek how she ended up with someone like taylor. there were more nice comments than hate, but the hate ones stuck out the most. y/n turned off her phone throwing it across the room.

y/n walked into the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror.

"ugh i look disgusting maybe they are right. maybe i should lose some weight.." y/n sighed as she looked in the mirror.

y/n walked back into the bedroom and walked over to pick up her phone where it landed. when she picked up her phone she had dozens of notifications from instagram. she opened them and they were all dms.

y/n opened them and they were all people saying how she fat she was, how she should go kill herself, she doesn't belong with someone like taylor, how ugly she was, and even more hurtful things.

y/n felt tears stinging her eyes and she set her phone down on the bed and rushed into the bathroom think she locked the door behind her.

y/n rummaged in the cabinet under the sink to find a razor. she took the blade out and then made her way to the bathtub and sat in it.

y/n started sobbing. she hated how she looked. maybe she didn't deserve to be with taylor. as those thoughts flooded her head she began to slash her wrist. she first winced as the pain, but she knew that she deserved it. she got so lost in what she was doing that she cute really deep and started to bleed badly.

"oh shit shit shit shit!" y/n whined.

y/n hoped out the bathtub and grabbed a washcloth and dampened it and held it over her wound. she went to go sit back in the bathtub. she started sobbing and there was blood everywhere. she soon was interrupted by the sudden calling of her name by taylor.

"y/n! i'm back! where are you?" taylor yelled.

no answer

taylor started to walk up the stairs and opened the door to their shared bedroom.

y/n heard the door open and she panicked. how was she supposed to cover up all this blood that was now dried and stained the tub.

knock knock

"y/n are you in there?" taylor asked softly.

"u-um yeah, i'm in here" y/n chocking back a sob.

"omg y/n are you okay?" taylor asked.

"i'm fine i'm fine!" y/n said trying to make it sound like she wasn't in pain and she wasn't just crying.

"can i come in?" taylor asked through the closed door.

"NO! i-i mean no." y/n said holding her head in her hands after her slip up.

"i'm coming in y/n.." taylor said slowly opening the door.

taylor's eyes went wide when she saw the scene.

"please don't be mad tay.." you said starting to sob, " i'm so sorry"

taylor rushed to you side and picked you up out of the bathtub. she walked you over the bed.

"y/n, i need you to honest with me, what did you do?" taylor said trying to sound calm even though she was panicking on the inside.

"tay, please don't be mad," you said shakily.

"baby, i promise i'm not mad and i'm not here to judge you. i'm here to help you, okay?" taylor said holding you.

"o-okay, um i.." you said a little bit over a whisper.

"it's okay you don't need to tell me right now, but can you show me?" taylor said. her voice was so reassuring.

you nodded your head. taylor proceeded to unravel the damp cloth to reveal the cuts that were under it.

"oh y/n.." taylor gasped.

"i'm sorry tay i'm so so so sorry. i didn't mean to i-it just happened." you said as you sobbed.

"shh y/n it's okay. relax. i'm here to help you." taylor said. "stay here i'm gonna go grab the first aid kit." taylor said.

when taylor returned, she cleaned your wounds and bandaged them up.

"y/n can you tell me why you did this?" taylor asked softly while holding your hands.

you took a deep breath. "well i was looking at the post you posted and i really liked it. i liked how we looked together and i loved spending time with you. well i opened the comments and i saw what everyone was saying. they were basically degrading me and saying how i'm ugly, how it looked like i gained weight, how i didn't shouldn't be with someone like you, and how you deserve better. a-and i guess they just got to me and i thought that harming myself was what i deserved... i'm so sorry taylor" you said while crying.

"y/n, you have nothing to be sorry about. you are so beautiful and i love you so much. i really wish you won't listen to what the cruel people have to say about you. you are perfect." taylor said as a tear fell from her eye.

this only made y/n sob harder and she began to shake as she cried. taylor held her in her embrace until y/n stopped crying. she looked down at y/n and saw that she was asleep. it broke her heart at the thought of you crying yourself to sleep. but, what hurt more was how those cruel people said such horrible things to her girlfriend.

————————————————————————
part 2 coming soon!
word count 1.1k