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The relief, the confusion of joy and guilt, suddenly reminded me of the day I'd come home, so many decades ago. I hadn't been ready then, either. I'd planned to wait. I wanted my eyes to be golden again before Namjoon saw me. But they were still a strange orange, an amber that tended more toward red. I was having difficulty adapting to my former diet. It had never been so hard before. I was afraid that if I didn't have Namjoon's help, I wouldn't be able to keep going, that I would fall back into my old ways.
It worried me, having that evidence so clear in my eyes. I wondered what was the worst reception I could expect? Would he just send me away? Would he find it difficult to look at me, to see what a disappointment I had become? Was there a penance he would demand? I would do it, whatever he asked. Would my efforts to improve move him at all, or would he just see my failure?
It was simple enough to find them; they hadn't moved far from the place I'd left them. Maybe to make it easier for me to return?
Their house was the only one in this high, wild spot. The winter sun was glinting off the windows as I approached from below, so I couldn't tell if anyone was home. Rather than take the shorter route through the trees, I paced toward them through an empty field, blanketed in snow, where even bundled up against the sun's glare I would be easy to spot. I moved slowly. I didn't want to run. It might alarm them. It was Seokjin who saw me first.
"Taehyung!" I heard him cry, though I was still a mile out.
In less than a second I saw his figure dart through a side door, racing through the rocks surrounding the mountain ledge and stirring up a thick cloud of snow crystals behind him.
Taehyung! He's come home!
It was not the mindset I'd been expecting. But then, he hadn't seen my eyes clearly.
Taehyung? Can it be?
My father was following close behind him now, catching up with his longer stride. There was nothing but a desperate hope in his thoughts. No judgment. Not yet.
"Taehyung!" Seokjin shouted with an unmistakable ring of joy in his voice. And then he was upon me, his arms wrapped tight around my neck, his lips kissing my cheek over and over again. Please don't go away again.
Only a second later, Namjoon's arms encircled us both. Thank you, he thought, his mind fervent with sincerity. Thank you for coming back to us.
"Joon... Jin... I'm so sorry. I'm so-"
"Shush, now," Seokjin whispered, tucking his head against my neck and breathing in my scent. My boy.
I looked up into Namjoon's face, leaving my eyes open wide. Hiding nothing.
You're here. Namjoon stared back at my face with only happiness in his mind. Though he had to know what the color of my eyes meant, there was no off note to his delight. There's nothing to apologize for. For them, their prodigal son had come home.
