When we are happy

Chapter 24: Belt

I walk into my house to silence.

Anxiety scratches into my stomach.

Silence isn't good. Silence is bad.

"Dad?" I call.

No response.

I go upstairs and into my mums room.

Tears spring to my eyes.

It's empty, the bed is here, but there's no medical devices. It's all gone.

I grab my phone out and call my dad as i begin to sob.

"Pick up, pick up." I beg.

"What, Penelope?" My dad snaps.

"Where's Mama?" I cry.

Is she gone?
Did she die?

"She's at the hospital."

"Why?"

"Because she's not fucking better," He snaps, "She's staying here now. She's too unwell to be home."

I drag my hand down my face, "Why didn't you call me? I would of come home."

"You were off being a slut. Your mother doesn't deserve to see you on her final days. You ruined her life."

I slide down onto the floor and curl up into a ball. His words are just as painful as his hits.

"Papa," I sob, "How much longer does she have?"

His breath turns uneven and i can hear it harsher over the phone, "A week."

I sit on the floor, curled up a sobbing mess.

"Stop fucking crying, you're the reason she's like this." Dad swears.

"I know that," I gasp for air, "I'm so sorry."

"Too fucking late." It beeps as he hangs up.

I run my hands through my hair and sob as i get up. I need to go see her.

I quickly get up and get on my bike and ride to the hospital.

There's nothing else on my mind besides three words.

It's your fault.

It doesn't take long to reach the hospital and i climb off my bike walking in and up to the front desk.

The lady looks at me, "Hi honey, how can i help you?"

"I-i'm here to see my mum."

"What's her name?"

"Marianne."

"She's on floor 3, room 14."

"Thank you." I whisper and go to the elevator.

I'm not in full control of my body. I'm not focusing. I'm in a daze of pain and it's all i can seem to focus on.

There's so much pain. And i don't know how to not notice it.

I reach my mothers room and i open the door.

My dad is sitting there staring at her. His eyes shift to me and the sadness turns to anger.

Oh god.

I look back at mama as she's sleeping. I walk over and kiss her forehead.

"I'm so sorry, Mama." I sniffle.

"We're leaving now." My dad stands up.

"But i only just got here." I argue back without even thinking.

I flinch and stand up as he puts his hand on my shoulder. He uses it to guide me out the room and into the elevator as he holds me tightly.

His nails dig into my skin and i'm sure it's about to draw blood.

The doors open and we walk out leaving the hospital.

"Ride your bike home. And don't even think about any funny business." He grits.

I nod and climb onto my bike watching as my dad drives off without me.

I go home and my entire body shakes as i put up the stand of my bike.

I open the door and go in.

"Took you long enough." He takes a gulp of his beer.

He comes towards me and spins me around so i'm pressed against the wall.

I press my cheek to the wall and close my eyes.

My dad leans his body against me as he moves his hips.

"Dad, what are you doing?" I gulp. The way his hands touch my body, the way i can hear him breathing. I'm so uncomfortable.

Everything about him makes my uncomfortable.

I hear the sound of his belt undoing and i begin to sob.

"Shut up." He whips my back.

I cover my mouth with my hand as i cry so hard i can't hear, see, or think.

He begins to hit me harder and harder, different ways, different methods.

I feel the buckle stab into my skin and i choke out a scream.

"I told you to shut up!" He whips me consistently.

I fall to the ground unable to hold my body up any more.

I think this time i'm really going to pass out. From lack of oxygen or the pain, i don't know. I don't care.

Four more hits until my eyes fall closed and i have no control of my body.

~~

I blink open my eyes and look around seeing i'm still on the floor.

I spot new blood on the walls. My blood.

I sit up and my head spins. I use the wall to stop myself from hitting my head.

I pull my phone out of my bum pocket and see it's 11am the next day.

He left me here all night.

My phone pings with a message from Parker.

Parker: Where are you, P? Are you okay?

I don't bother responding.

I need to distance myself. It's better for the both of us.

He doesn't need me. He has his friends. I'm just burdening him. I'm burdening everyone.

I'm starting to think it's not going to be okay anymore.

And it's all my fault.

haha! totally not pulling of my real life to write these scenes! haha!