Away we go

8- Indonesia

I prop my tablet on a stand and rest my weight on my left hip while I twist my right leg to cut my toenails.

A permanently unimpressed Carlos looking at a distance while his fellow F1 drivers are being questioned by someone behind the camera, plays on.

These are videos for various sponsors and channels that the drivers are supposed to take part in. Fans love these less stressful moments and the fun side of them.

Hope tells me that usually on track the niceties are cut out due to immense pressure and high stakes. These funny video shoots give the players a chance to reconcile and let loose, remembering that what happens on track stays on track.

I haven't seen any races yet. Not even on live stream channel. Its unnerving and I'm a coward. But I do not miss these videos that give me a only a little insight on Carlos' professional life.

We are miles apart. He is in Miami and I'm on the other side of world in Indonesia for climate crisis and policies debate. Its no fair but we are hoping to make long distance work.

I laugh as he pronounce jugs as yags, given his spanish roots. Unlike me , Carlos has been in Spain for a long while that the Spaniard in him shines through. People can hardly tell I'm a latina because of my American accent.

Missing him and his quirks, I call him. He picks up several rings later and its all blur and dark and hazy.

"Hey baby!" His sleepy voice tells me I'm dumb.

"Shit sorry I didn't realize the time difference." I move to immediately cut the phone but he stops me.

"I want to be inconvenienced by you Nina," he says , his voice raspy and my hsart swoons.

"Was just making sure you were okay."

"I'm now."

I see his veiny arm as he props himself on one and I immediately long for his warmth. We talk for sometime before reminding overselves that we have a job we need to go back to.

FOR a relationship that is relatively very new we sure have a lot of trust in each other to try and work this long distance thing. Truth be told I'm miserable. But then again I'm expecting my periods any day now and I'm pretty sure more than seventy percent of what I feel is because of my PMS. That horny feeling before and after your periods should be illegal. Right now more than missing Carlos, I want to climb him like a fucking tree.

As I wait for my flight to London my phone buzzes. Hoping its Carlos I almost throw the paper on the next seat and take it out only to make a face when Stephen's name pops up.

I pick it up and grunt a 'hey'.

"Bad day, huh," he says and I know he is smiling.

"I'm having cramps but I'm being really brave about it," I tell him yawning.

Instantly he looses his composure. "Did you eat solid food? Don't drink anything too cold it fucks up the body temperature and you'll end up catching cold. Do you want me to pick you up when you land?"

"Calm down Steph....I am fine and I don't want you to take half day but I'll like it if you stop by later at night. And I will love you if you come with chocolates and crappy food."

"Duly noted."

Later that night when I was halfway through an episode of Loki, Stephen came with pizza and chicken wings and tiramisu.

He walks into the room and looks at the television screen for a second before nodding and settling right into the sofa next to mine. We watch the movie while eating and when its over, he finally sits upright again."God bless female directors." We say together looking up.