Choices | Min Yoongi | On Hold

11

"Yoongi stop, I can't take it anymore!" I struggled while laughing trying to get away from Yoongi's grip that was tickling me, making me squirm.

"Tell me you'll go with me to the party" he said stopping for a bit to answer but continuing a second later making my sequels continue.

"Fine, FINE! I'll go!" I said through my laughter. My words making him stop, I sat up slowly still scared he'll tickle me again.

"Good. I bought the perfect dress for you the other day" he said walking off to his room

"Why would I need a new dress for a party?"

"You don't but you'll love it believe me" he shouted from his bedroom. I didn't really have the strength to argue so I just waited for him to show me the dress

---

Walking to my favourite cafe I couldn't help but think about him, what will I do if I am pregnant? The symptoms are all there and my missed period is the biggest one. I really can't afford this. Will I get an abortion if I am?

Shit.

Deciding to push that thought away I opened the door, the sweet smell of the baked goods filling my nostrils making me instantly hungry.

Walking up to the girl working I ordered a chai and a chocolate cake piece, after sitting down I realized I haven't seen June in a while, has she quit? It's like everyone that knew Yoongi disappeared out of my life right after our argument.

Sitting there a while I just started out the window looking at the Christmas lights hanging from the store fronts, Christmas music playing. The holidays were clearly coming but I still couldn't feel the Christmas spirit, too consumed in my own thoughts and mistakes.

"Hey didn't think I'd see you here" I heard a familiar male voice talking next to me, so I turned my head towards the voice.

I wish I hadn't.

---

"So how was work?" Asked Marie as soon as I got home.

A week ago I finally started my job at the clothing store. The job wasn't that difficult, however my sickness made some days difficult, and today was finally the day I stopped by a pharmacy on the way home and got a couple of pregnancy tests.

It's almost Christmas and I just now almost two months after our fight am taking the stupid test. I couldn't deny it any longer after missing my period for a second time.

"It wasn't bad, just got sick again so I got this so we know if this is the cause" I said lifting up the small see through bag that held the tests.

"Took you long enough. I'm here if you need me though" she said and took a pause before continuing "I'm going to wait on the couch call me if you need me"

---

"I can't be.." I stared at the test hoping those two lines will blend into one, hoping all of this is just one big misunderstanding.

"Of course it's when we have a fight I find this out" I muttered clenching the small stick. I don't know what to do, should I go to a doctor or tell Yoongi, maybe my mom? Another sigh slipped out of my mouth.

A part of me knew I am pregnant, a part of me didn't, anther part hoped if I waited long enough the problem will disappear. It didn't the problem is still here and growing fast.

I guess the father has the right to know, even if he wouldn't want the baby, a call shouldn't hurt.

I picked up my phone hands shaking, the fear I pushed aside for months all coming at once making me shake. I need to do this, I need him to pick up. Will he?

The phone rang, once, twice, thrice, again and again, until it didn't, I tried again and again, until I gave up. He doesn't care. He wants me out of his life. He wants me and our baby out.

I have no choice but to keep us out. I have no idea where he went.

---

"it's going to be okay" said Marie holding me in her embrace as she tried her best to comfort my now uncontrollably shaking body on the floor

She got worried after I didn't get out of the bathroom for a while, just to find me on the floor clenching my hair.

"Will it? The father doesn't even know or wants to know. My parents will disown me when they find out, no one will ever want me with a baby, Marie. What will I do?" I rambled with a shaky voice. My mind was all over the place.

This time I couldn't push it aside.

"We'll think of something. Your parents don't have to know right now if you don't want them to know. You have a job, I'll help, my job pays well enough. The two of us will be fine" she said caressing my hair. Her words however didn't really comfort me, it all felt hopeless, trying felt worthless.

Nothing will change.

And it won't get any better.