Lost Time.

Saying Goodbye

{Talk of Suicide, and self harm! you've been warned}

After your date with König, you felt that everything was going great. I mean, you met back up with your ex lover, started talking again, and even went on a lunch date together. You had your lover back, well, sorta, but you were happy.

You thought.

About two months ago your mother's life was taken due to lung cancer. She was a chain smoker, so it added up, but she was taken way too early. You weren't the closest with her, but she was still your mother. She gave life to you, took care of you, did pretty much everything for you, and you loved her.  She wasn't the perfect mother, but she did her best for you and your two older brothers.

Of course, you were devastated. Although you were taking it pretty well. You did cry for a while after she passed, and after her funeral, but you took it pretty well. You were never the type to get so depressed that you'd resort to self harm, or even suicide. Your mother'a death took a horrible turn on you, making you resort to those things.

You looked at your scars on your thighs, stomach, and wrists in the mirror. they were slightly faded, but they were still very visible. They were now two weeks old, so you covered them up with hoodie sleeves, or anything you could. You were highly insecure, they made you feel weak.

You felt disgusted looking at your body in the mirror. You felt ugly. Worthless. There was nothing in the mirror that you liked. You out your clothes back on to hide the scars, and your body which you hated deeply. You sat on your bed crying. You cried over everything. The memory of your mother passing. The memory of when König first left those years ago. How ugly and insecure you felt about your body. You cried over the scars... You knew they would most likely be there forever, if not years.

You cried for hours. You cried till you couldn't cry anymore. You felt nothing anymore. You took our your notebook and began writing letters to those who you loved dearly.

Your father.
Your brothers.
Your very few friends.
Your aunts and uncles.
König.

You write the letters to say goodbye. To tell them you loved them. Tell them that you will miss them, and that you'll see them in the afterlife.

You placed all the envelopes on the table next to your bed, and you powered off your phone, and locked your room door. Your roommate, Chelsie wasn't home. You grabbed all the pills you could find in your bathroom, which were Tylenol, Benadryl, Excedrin, and your antidepressants.

You don't remember how many you took, but if you had to guess, possibly over 30.

You collapsed on the floor.

                            Chelsie
I hear a thud coming from YN's room.

"YN!?" I yell going to their room.

I bang on the door.

"YN ARE YOU OKAY!?" I yell getting worried

I knew about all of YN's problems recently, her mom passing and most of her friends leaving her... I can only hope she passed out.

"YN!?!?" I yelled louder.

I wasn't supposed to be at our apartment, but i had forgotten something, so I returned to pick up my wallet.

I kick in the door till it breaks open.

YN was lying on the ground, unconscious.

"YN! OH MY GOD!!" I said running to her side dropping all my things.

I shook them violently to cry to wake them up until i saw the open pill bottles, and many letters sitting on the bedside table. This could only mean one thing...

"NONONONO YN!!"

I shakily picked up my phone and dialed 911, tears welling up in my eyes, my heart aching for them. I was terrified.

I put my phone on speaker and set it on the ground, desperately trying to see if YN was okay.

"Hello, 911 what is the emergency?" I heard through the phone.

"Hello!! yes yes!! I think my roommate YN LN tried to overdose on pills, please help me!! The address is 106 West Walnut Street!! Please hurry her pulse is slowing down!!" I said frantically to the phone.

"Calm down ma'am i am sending units your way. make sure they maintain a heart beat and are breathing."

After what felt like forever, YN was safe in the hospital room somewhat stable.