Divergent | Jungkook AU

Chapter Four

I REACH MY street five minutes before I usually do, according to my watch—which is the only adornment Abnegation allows, and only because it’s practical. It has a gray band and a glass face. If I tilt it right, I can almost see my reflection over the hands.

The houses on my street are all the same size and shape. They are made of gray cement, with few windows, in economical, no-nonsense rectangles. Their lawns are crabgrass and their mailboxes are dull metal. To some the sight might be gloomy, but to me their simplicity is comforting.
The reason for the simplicity isn’t disdain for uniqueness, as the other factions have sometimes interpreted it.

Everything—our houses, our clothes, our hairstyles—is meant to help us forget ourselves and to protect us from vanity, greed, and envy, which are just forms of selfishness. If we have little, and want for little, and we are all equal, we envy no one.

I try to love it.

I sit on the front step and wait for Yoongi to arrive. It doesn’t take long. After a minute I see grayrobed forms walking down the street. I hear laughter. At school we try not to draw attention to ourselves, but once we’re home, the games and jokes start. My natural tendency toward sarcasm is still not appreciated. Sarcasm is always at someone’s expense.

Maybe it’s better that Abnegation
wants me to suppress it. Maybe I don’t have to leave my family. Maybe if I fight to make Abnegation work, my act will turn into reality.

“Jiwoo!” Yoongi says. “What happened? Are you all right?”

“I’m fine.” He is with Minnie and her brother, Soobin, and Minnie is giving me a strange look, like I am a different person than the one she knew this morning. I shrug.

“When the test was over, I got sick.
Must have been that liquid they gave us. I feel better now, though.” I try to smile convincingly.

I seem to have persuaded Minnie and Soobin, who no longer look concerned for my mental stability, but Yoongi narrows his eyes at me, the way he does when he
suspects someone of duplicity.

“Did you two take the bus today?” I ask. I don’t care how Minnie and Soobin got home from school, but I need to change the subject.

“Our father had to work late,” Minnie says, “and he told us we should spend some time thinking before the ceremony tomorrow.”

My heart pounds at the mention of the ceremony.

“You’re welcome to come over later, if you’d like,” Yoongi says politely.

“Thank you.” Minnie smiles at Yoongi.

Soobin raises an eyebrow at me. He and I have been exchanging looks for the past year as Minnie and Yoongi flirt in the tentative way known only to the Abnegation.

Yoongi’s eyes follow Minnie down the walk. I have to grab his arm to startle him from his daze. I lead him into the house and close the door behind us. He turns to me. His dark, straight eyebrows draw together so that a crease appears between them.

When he frowns, he looks more like my mother than my father. In an instant I can see him living the same kind of life my father did: staying in Abnegation, learning a trade, marrying Minnie, and having a
family. It will be wonderful. I may not see it.

“Are you going to tell me the truth now?” he asks softly.

“The truth is,” I say, “I’m not supposed to discuss it. And you’re not supposed to ask.”

“All those rules you bend, and you can’t bend this one? Not even for something this important?” His eyebrows tug together, and he bites the corner of his lip. Though his words are accusatory, it sounds like he is probing me for information—like he actually wants my answer.