Chapter Fourteen

20 4 0
                                    

TODAY IS THE day before Visiting Day. I think of Visiting Day like I think of the world ending: Nothing after it matters.

Everything I do builds up to it. I might see my parents again. I might not. Which is worse? I don’t know.

I try to pull a pant leg over my thigh and it sticks just above my knee. Frowning, I stare at my leg. A bulge of muscle is stopping the fabric. I let the pant leg fall and look over my shoulder at the back of my thigh. Another muscle stands out there.

I step to the side so I stand in front of the mirror. I see muscles that I couldn’t see before in my arms, legs, and stomach. I pinch my side, where a layer of fat used to hint at curves to come.

Nothing.

Dauntless initiation has stolen whatever softness my body had. Is that good, or bad? At least I am stronger than I was. I wrap my towel around me again and leave the girls’ bathroom.

I hope no one is in the dormitory to see me walking in my towel, but I can’t wear those pants. When I open the dormitory door, a weight drops into my stomach.

Yeonjun, Molly, Drew, and some of the other initiates stand in the back corner, laughing. They look up when I walk in and start snickering.

Molly’s snortlaugh is louder than everyone else’s. I walk to my bunk, trying to pretend like they aren’t there, and fumble in the drawer under my bed for the dress Hanni made me get.

One hand clamped around the towel and one holding the dress, I stand up, and right behind me is Yeonjun. I jump back, almost hitting my head on Hanni’s bunk.

I try to slip past him, but he slams his hand against Hanni’s bed frame, blocking my path. I should have known he wouldn’t let me get away that easily.

“Didn’t realize you were so skinny...but hot, Stiff.”

“Get away from me.” My voice is somehow steady.

“This isn’t the Hub, you know. No one has to follow a Stiff’s orders here.” His eyes travel down my body, not in the greedy way that a man looks at a woman, but cruelly, scrutinizing every flaw.

I hear my heartbeat in my ears as the others inch closer, forming a pack behind Yeonjun.

This will be bad.
I have to get out of here.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see a clear path to the door. If I can duck under Yeonjun’s arm and sprint toward it, I might be able to make it.

“Look at her,” says Molly, crossing her arms. She smirks at me. “She’s practically a child.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” says Drew. “She could be hiding something under that towel. Why don’t we look and see?”

Now. I duck under Yeonjun’s arm and dart toward the door. Something pinches and pulls at my towel as I walk away and then yanks sharply—Yeonjun’s hand, gathering the fabric into his fist.

The towel slips from my hand and the air is cold on my naked body, making the hair on the back of my neck stand on end.

Laughter erupts, and I run as fast as I can toward the door, holding the dress against my body to hide it. I sprint down the hallway and into the bathroom and lean against the door, breathing hard.

I close my eyes.
It doesn’t matter.
I don’t care.

A sob bursts from my mouth, and I slap my hand over my lips to contain it. It doesn’t matter what they saw. I shake my head like the motion is supposed to make it true.

With shaking hands, I get dressed. The dress is plain black, with a V-neck that shows the tattoos on my collarbone, and goes down to my knees.

Once I’m dressed and the urge to cry is gone, I feel something hot and violent writhing in my stomach.

Divergent | Jungkook AUWhere stories live. Discover now