Heat

V.

Time seemed to race ahead to the moment Ethan and I were to meet up again. We didn't have any similar classes with each other nor did we ever run into each other in passing. I assumed I would just meet him outside again, so I went to my usual spot that I would wait for the bus but instead of looking out for the bus I rotated back towards the school entrance to wait for him. My earphones in and my foot tapping in anticipation. Finally I see him emerge from entrance and sling my bag over my shoulder with glee. It was nice having a friend for once, regardless of circumstance and if he actually was my friend but it was nice to have someone around. I don't know what I missed.

"Hey Ethan" I offer a small smile as I meet up with him. I fall in lime with his strides and end up looking down at my feet feeling slightly insecure. Maybe I was being a little too friendly with him too quickly. I wasn't sure how the friend thing worked if that's what I should call him. I saw a smile that graced his lips and felt a little bit of relief.

"Hey, ready for today's training?" He still kept his smile as if to reassure me that yes, in fact we were still doing this and I didn't overthink the whole situation.

"I guess I am, is it going to be the same as yesterday?" I question as we reach his truck. We jump in and he starts the truck to pull off towards the pack house. He hums a bit before replying to think of his answer.

"Sort of but I have more instruction for you before you shift" more instruction. What would that entail?

"Am I allowed to ask more questions about being a werewolf?" I fidget with the hem of my hoodie. I had more questions after yesterday. This is now day two of being a werewolf, I didn't sleep too much last night with how many question I wanted answers to.

"Of course, I am your teacher for the foreseeable future" he joked.

"Well I was wondering what shifting was like for you, is it always so painful and do you ever lose your memory like me?" His jaw tensed at the question. Was this too sensitive of a topic to ask him. I wasn't sure if I should apologize and ask a different question or just keep quiet and pretend I didn't say anything. I started to say something but Ethan suddenly spoke.

"It can be different for everyone," he sighed "It is always going to be painful but you grow a tolerance for it. Memory, the only time I don't remember anything would be when my emotions are too high. Like I'm angry or upset about something" his hands gripped the steering wheel a bit tighter.

"Was that a bad question to ask?" I ask him nervous of the answer.

"No, it's just... I don't like thinking about my black outs because they are not happy memories" I shouldn't pry any further about his pain. I knew virtually nothing about him but it seemed to bother him a lot.

"I'm sorry, I-I didn't know"

"It's okay Edan. Really you don't know and it's fine to ask me anything really" he looks over and smiles at me. I return his smile and look down at my hands again.

"Are rogues always dangerous?"

"Very rarely are rogues harmless. Some are runaways from sticky situations but there are very dangerous ones that chose to rebel and go against the pack mentality. Ironically they end up grouping up and taking on packs but that is very rare especially these days" there wasn't any emotion in his voice, just stating the facts of what rogues were. I let out a small "oh" and focused my eyes further on my hoodie. No wonder people kept their distance from me. They probably thought I was some rabid animal.

"Is it okay for me to continue going to the pack house with you as a rogue?" The people at school treated me harshly with glares and exclusion and now I was hanging out with their leader. What did the other's think of me?