Normal - What Autism feels like (to me) (NOT FINISHED)

Autism and Relationships (serious ones included)

What can I say... It is a two-sided sword. It may be difficult to build relationships from scratch. The "better" side: Talking about friends, they have potential to last a lifetime. I mean honestly. If someone is getting along with you regardless of your flaws, you need to keep them! There something like a phase. If you get along for like one or two years, it is possible that you will end up being great friends, at least from my experience. I understand though that for neurotypical individuals, an autistic friend can be quite challenging sometimes. Trust me, it is worth it because you will always having someone who is straightforward and - honest. What is both the best and worst thing is literally our brutal honesty. Not everyone can stand it, most need it. And I believe that it is amazing to have a friend that knows how to deal with difficult situations and act like a... translator? Weird choice of words but it is kind of accurate. Let me give you an example: Say, you see your friend in a discussion with someone and he gets angry even though the other person is just joking or using sarcasm. It's your time to shine - you can approach your friend and say "Hey, I noticed you got a bit frustrated but he is not really meaning what he said and didn't intend to offend you". That's how translators work, don't they? 

I feel like that feelings above friendship - and that is just my experience - are just WAY trickier. Autism and romantic relationships don't really like each other. 

While in my experience - relationships with autism may have their perks, i.e. honesty, communication et cetera - it is quite challenging for others, especially if they are neurotypical. Honestly, my best experiences were with those that were neurodivergent! Speaking about sitting in the same boat, you know... 

I don't want to scare you off though - if you are willing to put in the effort, we are excellent partners! Some people may even appreciate the way we are. And let's be honest, all relationships require you to put in the work. 

You know, when in an autistic relationship, you really have to take the "Communication is key" seriously. I can remember all those arguments I had because I misinterpreted something and oh boy, it's worse via text or phone calls because I can't try to connect the meanings by mimics or gestures. Though, I really think that most of those arguments were sorted very quickly and were quite rarely nasty. This truly is something that I love about being autistic - the need of communicating my feelings, intentions and meanings really helps me and my partner to establish a deep bond.

And no, autistic people are not sociopaths with no emotions - we do have them but can't express them that easily. Rest assured, if you are in a relationship with an autistic person, they won't automatically be cold and emotionally unavailable. You do have to communicate with us if a certain behavior hurt you though. Because there is this thing where people expect someone to know they did something wrong but when they don't automatically apologize, the person gets mad. This is a big no-no! This would at most confuse us even further. It is way more effective to just say something like: "Hey, I really didn't like when you said.... because it made me feel ....". Trust me on that, save the time for quality time instead of arguing! There is this comment function I noticed, when you're reading this right now, feel free to comment your experience with autistic people compared to neurotypical individuals! Was it better? Worse? The same? I'm really curious. Most of the time, I dated people who were neurodivergent as well. I just feel an immediate spark, a click, whenever I notice a person being on the spectrum too. It is like knowing this person since the beginning of time! It is awesome. I think the reason for that are the shared struggles, mutual support!