Her, my love

A fatal disease

Some things than we don't ever want them to happen to our life sometimes hit us. Maybe Allah wants to test me. Our happiness didn't last long. A month left before our wedding. What we hoped left hopeless. We were very near to our red letter day. However, all our plans turned into a disaster.

Throughout a week after our engagement, I saw Ameer started to change. As if there were something wrong happening to him. His nose, most of the time bled. At first, I wasn't too much worried. But, as time flies, his bleeding became worst. I was worried due to his distraught condition. It never happened before when we spent time together while we were friends. That was a new thing to me. Whenever I asked him whether he's alright, he always replied,

"I'm fine. Don't worry about me. It's just a normal bleeding due to the hot weather. Nothing to worry about." He smiled try to assure me. Of course, I didn't fully believed him though because I am a doctor-to-be and I know something's wrong with him. However, I tried hard to accept his reason. Maybe the weather was the factor as the weather was scorching hot.

All my curiosity answered when he was diagnosed with a fatal disease - Leukimia. If it was the early stage, I wouldn't have worried too much. I was shocked and I felt like I was going to black out upon hearing what the doctor said. He experienced the last stage of Leukimia which happened to be the worst stage and he was able to live only for several months more. I cried. I was about to feel happy with him. Dreaming of living together, having children, sharing the bitter and sweet moments of our live together, solving problems together and sharing everything together. But, how can I achieve such dreams if he's going to leave the world and what's more saddening is he would leave me alone.

"Why didn't you tell me earlier about your disease?" I asked him wistfully.

His eyes filled with guilt... He apologised,

"I'm sorry, Meesya. If I tell you, will we ever be friends? Will we ever be engaged and be happy with our current live? And the most important is, will you be able to treat me not as a patient but as an ordinary guy whom you love with all your heart? Will you be able to do that? Can you answer me? You couldn't, could you?" It's the first time I saw him crying in front of me. At that moment, I knew how much he loved me. How sincere he was all this time. How unfortunate of him to be diagnosed with such fatal disease. And lastly, how I would really miss him when he's gone. We sat there reminiscing about our beautiful moments together accompanied by tears.