G'Day, Motherfu- I Can't Say That? My Bad

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"Y/N, you have media duty with Lyss," Emily notified as she breezed past you. "They want you down now."

You huffed, putting your phone on silent before thanking her and heading to the pre-game press conference for the Chicago Red Stars vs the Portland Thorns.

You, a cheeky Australian Forward that absolutely loved beating Defenders with flashy moves, were a constant starter for the CRS.

You'd been at the club for about a year, but you were yet to be widely appreciated by the media or other clubs throughout the globe.

"Hey, Lyssy," you nodded at the older woman as you pulled out the chair to her right. "You ready?"

The Keeper smiled slightly. "Game or conference?"

"Both."

She shook her head. "You know how good the Thorns are. And you also know how much I hate media duty."

The two of you fell into a comfortable silence as the reporters began to fill up the room.

"Let's begin," the CRS PR Manager announced. "Alyssa, Y/N, all yours."

"Hi guys, thanks for coming," Alyssa started. "I'm Alyssa Naeher, Captain and starting Goalkeeper for the Chicago Red Stars."

You waved. "G'day, motherfu—" you abruptly paused as the PR Manager shook his head wildly. "I can't say that? My bad."

The reporters chuckled.

You restarted. "G'day, my name's Y/N Y/L/N, one of the CRS' starting Forwards."

"Hi, Y/N," a reporter greeted. "What are your thoughts on the scouts that are said to be at this game?"

You raised your eyebrows. "I didn't know scouts were comin'."

"There are scouts from WSL and a few National teams here today."

You shrugged. "Just a regular day at the office. The scouts'll get the same treatment as everyone else. Next?"

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"TATUMN!" You yelled, waving your hand wildly for the ball.

She slotted a clean ball past a two Thorns Defenders, most likely knowing what was about to happen.

Coming face-to-face with USWNT Veteran Becky Sauerbrunn, you darted forwards, hitting her with two back-to-back shoulder drops that left the Defender in shambles, the woman ultimately gaping as you tapped the ball through her legs.

As you ran past the waiting Thorns Keeper, you backheeled the ball into the left bottom corner of the net.

"Let's go!" Yuki cheered, the Japanese woman tackling you to the ground in excitement. "No clean sheet for the Thorns!"

You rolled your eyes. "Yeah, well, we're still losing 3-1 with 10 minutes left including stoppage. Calm yourself down."

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"Oh fuck." You mumbled as Sam Coffey barreled towards you. You turned to the right, performing a quick Elastico to get around the frustrated Midfielder who groaned as you sped away.

You crossed the ball in front of the net in the hopes that Yuki or Ella would head it in, but a small smile creeped its way onto your face when it buried itself into the upper 90.

"3-2 baby!" Sarah cheered. "Y/N, you've got 2 more minutes to score, so bring it home!"

You lightly pushed a group of your teammates off of you. "Why can't someone else do it? Besides, 2 minutes is not enough time to score against any team, especially not Portland."

Ava ruffled your hair. "Okay, Spartacus, less talking, more scoring."

You glared at her as the team began to disperse back to their starting positions. "How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me that?"

She smiled cheekily. "A lot. But you win, like, every single 1v1 you take! You remind me of a gladiator."

You shook your head in amusement as the whistle blew.

Your team was fuckin' ridiculous.

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"Y/N! Take the shot or so help me I will murder you!" Bianca yelled from somewhere behind you. "Final whistle's gonna blow any second, just take the damn shot!"

You panicked, slamming your foot into ball from center Midfield.

Bella Bixby desperately tried to run back to her line, but the ball moved much faster and caught nothing but net as the CRS fans in attendance cheered loudly.

"Oops," you shrugged, grinning when the Thorns' jaws dropped. "My bad."

The final whistle blew, your teammates yelling in excitement before jumping on top of you.

Truth be told, everyone on the team had expected a loss, so a draw was a much better outcome than originally thought.

"Y/N!" Your coach called, a wide smile stretched across his face (The Red Stars are goin through some shit w/ the coaching staff rn, so bear with me here.) "There's a guy here that wants to talk to you. Go see him."

You jogged off, waving to the fans as you headed towards the man with a green and gold baseball cap and sunglasses.

"Hey, my Coach said you wanted to talk to me?" You asked, slowing to a stop as the incognito man looked up.

"Hi, Y/N. Great game you had," he said, sticking his hand out for you to shake. "I'm Tony. Tony Gustavsson."

You froze mid-shake. The Tony Gustavsson? Like, head coach of the Matildas Tony Gustavsson? "Sorry?"

He chuckled, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a golden-yellow card. "My phone number and my email. Check the caller ID before you decline some random number, you might just get a call up to the Matildas."

You watched, dumbfounded as he walked off with his hands in his pockets, whistling a tune.

What. The. Hell.


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First chapter's done!

I'm going to try my best to make this different than Little Mewis, but uh... it's kinda hard 😮‍💨

Hope you enjoyed, thanks for reading!

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