Worst Summer Ever... (Book 7 of Adopted by Jenna and Tyler Joseph)

25. Samantha

"So, Samantha," Doc said, as he got comfortable on the couch in Dad's office. He'd agreed to come see me at home so I didn't have to leave the house I hadn't seen in six weeks. I was glad. I didn't want to go anywhere. Not for a while, anyway. "Welcome home. I want to work on you dealing with what happened with Mark."

I frowned.

"I can imagine you've got some conflicting emotions around everything that transpired," Doc said, leading me towards talking about the past six weeks.

"I guess," I said. "I just don't understand it. Why he did it. I mean I know what he said was his reasoning but why wait so long? Though I guess what happened in January was in the press some, too."

"Well, I'm not going to speculate as to his reasons. I'm sure all of that will eventually come out. But yes. What happened was in the press. Not exactly what happened, but that you'd been assaulted."

"Yeah. I know," I said, frowning again. I remembered being so angry and scared when I heard on the radio about me being in the hospital and thinking everyone would know what happened.

But now, I figure I actually have a platform now. I can help people. Not that I'm about to go announcing what Tristan did, though.

"So, let's discuss how you're feeling about the past few weeks," Doc said. "What are your conflicting emotions. Let's explore them."

I frowned. Not something I wanted to do. But I knew I had to. Doc had been so awesome since I was younger. I've been through so much and he never judged me. And he never told me what to think, feel, or never even gave me advice unless I asked for it. So I knew whatever I said, he'd listen.

"Well, I don't know," I started.

"You know I don't accept that as an answer," He said.

"And you know that I take a minute to get to my actual thoughts," I smirked at him.

"Fair," he smiled.

"So, uh, again, I don't know. I mean, I'm pissed. He took me. He fucking just walked into the venue and took me."

"He did. Do you know how?"

"Dad told me he came in with the sound crew and  waited in my dressing room. I guess he knocked me out because I don't remember seeing him until he pulled me out of the crate he'd put me in."

"How did you feel when you woke up? Were you in the crate when you woke up?"

"I panicked.  I kicked the crap out of the inside of that crate. Until I tired out again. I fell asleep or passed out or something," I said.

"What happened with Mark? While you were with him?"

"Nothing really. He'd hit me any time I forgot to call him uncle," I said.

"I'm guessing you didn't care to be calling him uncle," Doc said. I frowned.

"I stopped thinking of him as my uncle when he sued Mom and Dad to try and get custody."

"Did your parents tell you about Carol?" Doc asked.

"Yeah. I was a little conflicted at first. But I also spoke to Carol yesterday when we got home."

"How was that?" Doc asked.

"Weird. It was actually kind of weird. I sort of had vilified her because of the whole thing with the passport when I was coming home and the school uniform thing," I said.

"What uniform and passport thing?" Doc asked.

"When I was supposed to leave, well, the morning of, my passport was missing. Benji took it apparently but now I wonder if Mark told him to. If he did I feel really bad about how I treated him when I left," I said.

"Okay. I want to hear about that, but what's the uniform story?"

"Carol took me to the store where they buy their school uniforms. They have whole stores that just sell school uniforms!  Anyways, Carol had me try on one of the uniforms for the school Emma goes to. I thought they were trying to get me to stay. Carol told me she really did just want to see how I'd look in it. And that if I had decided to stay for a semester, they'd have my size. But I think that if I had stayed for a semester, Mark wouldn't have let me leave England," I said.

Doc nodded.

"The advantage, I suppose," I continued. "Was that I was still a minor then and he was never my guardian. So I guess international police would have gotten involved?"

"Definitely," Doc said. "Tell me about how you treated Benji."

"I was a little mean to him before I left. I said goodbye, told him I still loved him but that he scared me by taking my passport."

"That doesn't sound unreasonable. And you apologized. So it sounds like there should be no hard feelings about that."

"I guess. I just feel a little bad if Mark manipulated him to take it. It wasn't his fault then."

"True. But you were going based on the information you had in the moment. I think you handled it appropriately."

I shrugged.

"Now, how are you feeling about Carol and her family now?"

I thought about it.

"Conflicted," I said.

"How so?"

"I've spent the last three years or so thinking they were all in on this plot to keep me in England and now I'm finding out that Carol wanted nothing to do with the suit. That she would have loved to have me spend a semester in England and that they would have enrolled me as a day student, not a boarding student. But again, I don't know that Mark would have let me leave if I had stayed."

"How do you feel about having had the opportunity to stay in England for a semester?"

"Now, I feel like it would have been kind of cool, if I remove Mark from the equation. But knowing what I know now, I'm glad I didn't. Fifteen year old me would not have handled it well if he'd tried to keep me there."

"If I'm honest, Samantha, I'm surprised - pleasantly - by how well you're handling this latest event."

I thought about that too.

"I think because I fought so hard to make it back, and because despite the blood sugar problems, and the infection, I don't think Mark actually wanted to hurt me. But I don't think he was mentally capable of realizing what he was doing. Don't think I'm forgiving him in any way. I'm not. I'm pissed at him and this certainly didn't raise him any higher but at the end of the day, I really don't think he intended any harm."

"That's incredibly mature of you," Doc smiled at me.

"Hey, I'm 18 now. I have to be mature. I am legally an adult."

"Good lord," Doc laughed as he rolled his eyes at me. And I laughed too. And it felt good. And natural.

We talked a little more. I told him how I got through my ordeal with Mark. I even told him how as I got sicker, I started to give up just a little. But that part of it was also probably because I hadn't had my antidepressants in six weeks and my depression and anxiety were higher then.

Once I was done with my appointment, I walked Doc out of Dad's office. Mom and Dad were in the living room. They said goodbye to Doc and reminded me to call the office to book for the following week.

Mom and Dad smiled at me as I came into the living room and sat down between them.

Rosie came running into the room with a piece of paper. Junie followed her.

"Sammy! Look! I maked you another picture!"

She climbed up on my lap and showed me her drawing.

"That's you, and that's Mama, and that's Daddy, and that's Junie and that's me. And we having a party because you home now!"

"I love it!" I said, hugging my sister. "This one is going on my wall."

I'd asked my parents for a binder and page protectors and I was keeping all of Rosie's drawings in it.

I sat back and basked in my little sisters' cuteness and my parents' love. I couldn't remember ever feeling this before that night in October five years ago.