Choices

My Luck

There were a lot to do in a city that was almost destroyed, but I focused on jobs for adventurers. Jobs that paid poorly and occupied me for days, but that allowed me to hunt the rest of the Absolute's disciples.

Even after the entire farce had been exposed, there were still people who worshiped him as an entity and who were capable of committing cruel and terrible acts in his name.

These jobs filled my pockets with coins and my time with anger, which was enough so I didn't have to think about him. Those were tiring, almost repetitive days, and nights filled with wine, mediocre bard songs in some tavern, and people I couldn't even remember the name of.

The first year had been difficult, almost unbearable, but it had gotten a little easier in the following years. It was amazing how I could still love him even though I wanted to forget him so badly.

And I did everything I could to forget.

I ignored any stories about vampires or a new force in the underworld. I didn't even look at missing people or missions if they'd the risk to put me on the trail of red-eyed beings, even if it filled me with gold. I avoided the Upper City and any parties called "Heroes of Baldur's Gate". I isolated myself from everyone else, not even giving them the opportunity to contact me. I just became a shadow of what I was, a fallen sorceress, an unfinished story. And with my luck, of course I was caught off guard.

It was another one of those nights when I had to drink too much and no wine in the world seemed to be enough to make me forget him. I got drunk until I reached my limit and drank even more while taking a stranger to my room.

A stranger which appearance I'd certainly have noticed better, if I hadn't been out of my mind.

I always judged myself for the way I acted, but I always repeated the same decisions, the same mistakes. As if each of them were beyond my reach, as if I were nothing more than an actor in a ridiculous play. A play in which I had ruled for a while, in which I was the leader, until I decided to decline everything to the point I was nothing more than a simple extra for everyone to laugh at.

I remember drinking something that made me even more euphoric, and then I felt hands around my neck.

— The master will love the gift.

I must have lost my senses for a few minutes or hours, as I was being dragged across a room when I woke up. I tried to move, cast some spell, but my body was immobilized, unable to move even an inch.

Paralysis poison, of course.

And like a good half-drow who had been raised on the surface, I didn't torture myself to build up resistance to any poison.

I was thrown to the floor at some point, hitting my nose on the smooth surface. I couldn't see anything but the feet around me, in a place that looked like a hall.

— Master, I brought you an offering. — My captor said, kneeling beside me.

Vampires.... No. Cazador wasn't the only vampire who had existed, and Astarion certainly wouldn't be the last either. There were others, and one of them should have come to make their nest in Baldur's Gate. Even more so if the news about Cazador's death had spread.

— I found her on the hunt today. She's certainly Master's type.

I would give anything to be able to move again, but the poison wasn't the only thing in my blood; the mixture of alcohol and poison was never a good combination, and it didn't make it any easier to resist the toxin.

— Let's see...

The voice would've made me freeze if I wasn't already paralyzed.

Damn it.

My captor grabbed my scalp again and forced me to lift my head. He forced me to look at him.

Curly white hair, a crown delicately resting on it. Pointed and elegant ears, pale skin, brown and reddish eyes that carried an excruciating hardness.

Astarion.

He was wearing a fussy white shirt with a V-neck and gold embroidery on his shoulders and sleeves. His pants were blue and deep red, with more gold embroideries. Luxurious clothes, like the man who wore them.

I forced myself to close my eyes. That was the only thing I could do at the moment, while an overwhelming emptiness invaded my heart.

My luck should be studied, because this was my worst nightmare happening right in front of my eyes. I couldn't do anything but feel shame, despair and...homesickness.

- WHAT DID YOU DO?

He must have been close, because his voice seemed to be coming from nearby.

— M-master, I...

My face fell to the ground again, but now, next to me, there was the crushed face of my captor. His wide red eyes, his pale brown skin, hiz black hair wet with his own secretions...

His blood dripped onto the floor, slowly coming towards me.

- GET OUT OF HERE! — That was his angry tone, the one that always appeared when he was confused and angry. - ALL OF YOU! GET OUT! NOW!

My captor's blood was already touching my skin, making me wonder how long I'd be forced to stay there, in that position. It was difficult to measure time in this kind of situation, but I knew that more than a handful of minutes had already passed.

— Look at how low you stooped— He cut the silence with his sadistic and judgmental tone of voice. — The great heroine of Baldur's Gate, kidnapped by some despicable child.

It was strange hearing him for the first time in years. Hearing every word that came out of his mouth, knowing that his mannerisms made everything even more extravagant, more unique, more fun. Even when the situation was sad or difficult, he always did that and managed to make me smile despite all expectations.

I heard him laugh, but there was no satisfaction in it.

Astarion did not lift my face by the scalp, as my captor had done. He didn't even lift me with violence or with the clear resentment he possessed, but he picked me up in his lap with care and a certain delicacy. A comforting touch I hadn't felt since the last time we traveled together.

His smell was almost the same. The herbal fragrance he had created with a touch of wine he was definitely drinking just moments ago.

It was comforting, in a way I'd never admit.

—What the hell were you thinking, my pet?— His tone of voice was low, almost inaudible.

I closed my eyes, letting myself forget about our bad choices. I wanted to forget about everything that had gone wrong, about all the decisions I regretted, of how I had diminished myself all these years, and how I had distanced myself...

For at least that moment, I just let myself be, only with our best moments, the memories that could make me warm. With the happiness we once shared.