Forgiven

Chapter Five - The Party - Kate

"I can't believe I agreed to even come to this party." I was dressed in black skinny jeans, a long sleeved, knitted, lavender colored sweater, and black flats. My hair was left down, the only patches of skin that don't have scars is my face and where the sun doesn't shine. I agreed to go to a frat party with my older cousin, Ryan Finch, he said he has buddies he wanted to 'introduce' me to. I'm the type of person, even before my trauma, who wanted to just stay home, watch movies, play board games or video games, pretty much anything besides partying. Somehow, I ended up here, standing in the foyer of a fancy frat house. Black lights lit most of the rooms besides the kitchen and bathrooms, the pool was lit by lights that change colors every few minutes. The house was already filling up with more people, the music's volume rising, the beer kegs stacking. No one was going upstairs, so I decided to place myself on the stairs a few steps up. I had a perfect view of the front door, to my right the archway leading to the dining room, another archway leading to the kitchen, and to my left a doorway that leads into the massive living/lounge room.
"Try to smile and enjoy yourself Kate, you deserve it." Ryan said, his tone sympathetic, God, I hate sympathy. Despite the fact that I don't like sympathy, I gave him a, hopefully believable, smile. He gave me a quick kiss on the forehead, then disappeared into the kitchen. Once again, I was alone. I enjoy being alone every now and then, but now was not a time I wanted to be alone. The front door kept opening, people filed in hollering 'Ya' or 'Woo', a few girls came in with the boys, but no one really caught my eye until He walked in. A man walked in front of Him, but I recognized Him immediately. The raven black hair, his piercing white eyes, his shocking height. The way he walked was so familiar, the set of his shoulders. Run, get up and run! My body immediately responded, my hands grabbed the railing, my body already turned to go up the stairs. The instincts I thought I'd lost all in one moment flooded every vein in my body. Within a matter of seconds I was on the upstairs landing. There were rooms directly in front of me, but there were also two hallways on either side of me. Quickly I decided to go left, I found a room in the middle of the hallway that seemed to be an office of some sort. I went into the room trying to stay as quiet as I could, shutting the door as softly as possible. The office had a bean bag in one corner of the room, a window above it, to the right of the bean bag was a typical desk, padded swivel chair, and a laptop open, the screen black. Pictures were scattered around the room, but the person who hung them had a purpose to their method. On the same wall as the door were an assortment of plants, flowers, and I think a fern. I'll just camp up here until I think the party's over. So I planted myself into the comfy looking bean bag chair, my nerves were screaming at me, but I've become used to the feeling. I grabbed a book off of the shelf next to me, the title read The Last Battle of Gettysburg, all I could think was fuck, this is going to be a very long night. I tried a variety of other books from the shelf, sadly they were all history books, freaking history majors, was all I could think. Finally I just swallowed my hatred for history and started reading.
An hour in of my camping in the office, I had to pee. The only problem with that is there isn't a bathroom in the office, on my way to the office I didn't pass one. I was royally screwed, although a few thoughts crossed my mind, I could pee in the plants, no one would know. I thought that would be too impolite to the plants and whoever they belonged to, so I tried again, Maybe I could hold it, just a little longer, maybe He won't come up stairs. The chances were definitely random and very infinite. Then finally the only rational thought entered my mind. If I'm quiet and quick maybe I can pee, then come back. Very unhappily, I stood up, before I opened the door I heard a voice in the hallway, it was barely audible; the man was talking just above a whisper. "I thought I saw her, she was sitting on the stairs, she was right there. I turned my head for a split second because Adam called for me, then I looked back and she was gone." Then the voice became very familiar, it was Him. He was talking about me. I nearly peed myself just standing there, thankfully I had a bladder of iron, when I didn't have any options. Then another voice.
"It's ok Ronan, we'll find her. We'll talk to her, hope she understands, then I don't know. We'll figure it out." The door knob started turning. My heart was in my throat. I moved to stand against the wall, good thing I decided to move out of the way because the door opened. I held my breath and didn't move. He, I guess his name was Ronan, was standing in the middle of the room, back to me, a brown headed man standing next to him. They talked about college life, exams, normal college stuff. They must have seen something interesting outside because they both rushed to look out the window. Then the brown headed man spoke, "It's Ryan, he must be looking for his cousin." That was my que to leave. Carefully, but very quickly I rounded the door, I rushed down the hallway. I descended the steps, opened the front door and went to go find Ryan's car.
Down the street I found Ryans deep red, brand new from the dealership, Jeep Wrangler. I pulled on the passenger door handle. It didn't open. No, no, no, no! This couldn't happen not now, please not now. I circled around to the drivers side door, I gave the handle a tug. It didn't open either. No! I nearly started crying because I'd escaped the Reaper, I'd escaped Ronan. Now I'm standing in front of my cousins car tugging on the handle repeatedly, and this is how I'm going to die. The tears almost started rolling down my cheeks, then a hand landed on my shoulder. My head turned slowly to look over my shoulder. Please let it be Ryan, please let it be Ryan. My eyes landed on the shoulder, then the face. I started crying.
Ryan was looking at me, confused. "What the hell are you doing out here, Kate, I've been looking for you?" I couldn't respond. My eyes were blurred by tears, my body was shaking from fear. Ryan hugged me, "Let's just go back inside ok, I'll try to get you something warm to drink, or something sweet to eat." I almost nodded my head in agreement, still I couldn't respond so I gently pulled on the handle to the Jeep. "Do you want to stay out here?" I nodded. He proceeded to unlock the door and handed me the keys. "Alright you can stay out here, but come back inside when you want to talk." He gave me a quick peck on the cheek, I watched him walk back across the street and disappear into the frat house. The sun by this time had already set, the street lamps giving off an extremely unwelcoming, uncomfortable, eerie glow. I sat in the silence, time passing by slowly, the night becoming darker by the hour. I pulled my legs up into the seat, I should at least try to sleep, I thought; I laid my forehead on my right kneecap, covering the rest of my head with my arms. So very softly, a knock tapped on the drivers side window. Without thinking about who might be there, I opened the Jeep door, my eyes were still closed. Assuming Ryan had climbed in, ready to go home, I resumed trying to go to sleep. The Jeep was filled with zero noise. Then a sniffle came from Ryan, I looked up. The street light illuminated Ronan's face, the light caught a tear rolling down his cheek, his eyes were focused on his hands that were neatly placed in his lap.
The air in my lungs was stolen from me by fear. I stayed absolutely still, my thoughts were racing. Didn't I lock the doors, why is he here? Is he here to kill me? Why is he crying? The last thought shocked me, why do I care if he's crying he deserves to cry. Then the silence broke, "Kate." Was all he said, his voice was gruff from crying. "I-I don't know if you'll listen to me, but I want to talk to you. I want to say that I'm so-"
"No, no. I'm not going to die, not like this. I survived you, I suffered because of you. Why did you come after me, to finish the job? You stopped killing, I've been watching for your patterns, and nothing. It's been silent, so you're here to kill me. To finish what you've started, then move on with your life." I don't know where the confidence came from, but I'm glad I'd said it. My hand slowly started making its way to the door handle.
"Kate, don't please," I was staring straight in front of me, my eyes locked, then something warm touched my hand, embraced it. I looked at my hand, Ronan's hand was holding mine, the warmth from his hands melting the cold out of mine. Briefly a thought crossed my mind, I like his touch. I immediately banned that thought from my head. I pulled my hand away, I turned to look him in the face. He was leaning on his right arm, over the middle console, his face ten inches away from mine. His eyes were so white, they almost glowed in the dark. There was something there, an emotion I could that puzzled him. Stop it! He's here to hurt me. Then I remembered, when he tortured me his eyes weren't white? "Can we talk, please?" I opened the door.
"Don't ever come near me again." My voice was almost a growl, but my face was wet from tears. I left the Jeep, a scar that was already open, widening. I heard the Jeep door open and close again, Ronan was coming after me. A primal instinct rose up inside me, a burning fire with an endless amount of kindling.
"Kate, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I ever hurt you. That I'd ever targeted you." I was already across the street, he was in the middle of the street. He had to yell just to talk to me. I stopped dead in my tracks, but my instincts were howling at me to run. His footsteps grew closer to me, "I want to talk to you, please. I never enjoyed hurting you. I'm sorry." His voice became even more rough, his sentence choked with tears.
Then a sentence flew out of my mouth, but I don't know why I'd said it, "If you're thinking of killing more people, I wouldn't scream that to the world." My voice was barely above a whisper, but he was now standing close enough to me to hear it. I walked calmly inside the house. The party was raging, all the lights were off, rooms dimly lit by rave lights, glowsticks, and black lights. Food wrappers covered the floor, empty solo cups laying on their sides, a brown liquid making a small stream out of it. Gyrating bodies filled each and every available space, except for upstairs. With much trouble, I moved through the bodies to the stairs, I went upstairs unnoticed. A few of the rooms I walked by had ties, or socks, on the door handle. God, I needed a place I could let my thoughts unravel, a place I could relax. The office, I thought, I made my way to the office, to much of my disliking, there was a dark brown and red tie wrapped around the neck of the door knob. I was fed up with people all together, so I prepared myself, but before I had the chance to open the door, a man's hand grabbed my shoulder. "Ronan, I swear to Go-" The man turned me around, I was face to face with a drunk frat boy. The look in his eyes explained everything.
"Hey, what's up baby girl? What do you say you and I...have some fun?" His words were slurred, his movements sloppy. The hand that was on my shoulder started creeping its way down towards my chest.
"Listen buddy, you're not my type. Not to mention we don't know each other. Go find a girl that's willing." My voice could hardly be heard over the loud, intoxicating music. I put my hands on his chest trying to push him off, but he wasn't budging, he leaned in even closer.
"We don't need to know each other honey, let's just have a little fun you and I." I tried to push him back as hard as I could, but he still wasn't moving, "Listen you little bitch!" His figure covered my entire field of vision. His heavily alcoholic scented breath was merging with mine. All of a sudden there was a blur of movement, then the man that lingered over me was now on the floor, "What the hell man! Wait your turn if you want her." He hissed, I moved my eyes, my body too scared to move, to look at the other man. Ronan? Ronan was standing only a foot away from me, both his fists were balled, he was practically the embodiment of rage.
"Kate, I know you don't want me here and you don't want to see me, but please let me at least take you home." Ronan's voice sounded oddly calm, he was still looking at the man who was still laying on the floor, probably too drunk to get up. I couldn't respond, Ronan added, "I'll take you straight home, Ryan can come with us. If I can find him. We don't have to talk, or look at each other. Please, let me take you home. I know what I did is unforgivable, but I can't see anyone rape you." His last sentence was more of a primal growl than human.
To my surprise, "Only if you find, and can get Ryan to the car. After tonight I don't want to see you, hear your voice, or even hear your name." He nodded his head, his expression sympathetic. Killers don't feel sympathy, so why does he look sad?
"Kate?" Ronan was looking at me now, he looked worried. His voice sounded like he was in a tunnel, my vision started darkening. He rushed to me, but it was all in slow motion, this happened a lot for a few weeks after escaping Ronan. I touched the space of skin between my top lip and nose. There was a warm, wet substance, I looked at my hand; blood covered the tips of my fingers. Next thing I know, my world was black.