colorless | j.murphy

one [1]

the grey room full of nothing became my everything three years ago. the only thing keeping me alive right now is my late birthday -i'm only four months away from being eighteen. and then i'm gone. i accepted my fate, not that i had any choice. here, on the ark, every crime is punishable by death. unless you're under eighteen, then you get locked up until you turn eighteen, and then you get floated in the space. and somehow that was the most normal thing up here.
today hasn't been much different. i woke up, ate some shitty breakfast and begged the guards for a few more books to read. since there's nothing much you can do here, i enjoyed reading. the books were the only thing that still connected us to the ground - the descriptions of trees and oceans, falling leaves in the autumn or bright colours of the spring. that's the closest to earth i can be. actually, that's the closest to earth anyone on this damned ship was in the past 97 years. i never would have guessed the next thing that's about to happen.

the usually quiet morning us prisoners have was replaced with screaming and yelling. my first thought was obvious - they are killing us to make room for new, younger criminals. my stomach started to hurt, like someone stabbed me a couple of times. all i could thing about was - i'm too young to die. i have four months left. i am not a criminal.

the guards bursted through the door and my thoughts were instantly blank - this is it. the end of my life. they stabbed me in the neck with a needle, probably so i can't hurt them or myself, or to get me to sleep so they can kill me easier.

the next moment i woke up in a some kind of a dropship surrounded by a lot of people whose names i did not know. i only recognised their faces from the ark and i had absolutely no clue about what was happening. my neck felt sore and hurted when i moved. i tried to look around but i could only turn my head to the left. and on my left there was this boy who looked like he was about to faint. i reckognized him from the botanic classes we used to share a couple of years ago - jasper jordan. and i also remembered him being arrested with his best friend only a couple of months before me because of growing and consuming marijuana. what a dumbasses. i also remembered his best friend monty, who always looked like he had no clue about anything but was actually extremely smart. i remember everyone saying how he's going to become the next youngest engineer. but it looks like he kind of messed up paths.

jasper looked at me and smiled, i figured out he might have reckognized me from classes, or maybe he's just being polite and i was staring at him. my neck was feeling less sore and i looked right, and the first thing i saw was a boy floating in air - zero gravity's charm. it looked hella fun, too bad i was such a coward to try it. the blonde girl started lecturing him and the sound of her voice gave me chills - fucking clarke griffin. i looked her straight in her eyes and at at that exact time she looked at me. it's been years since we last saw each other.

"anastasia?" her eyes looked watery. she sneaked a soft smile on her face and i couldn't hold my happiness either. i thought i might never see my sister again. on second look i noticed wells sitting in a chair next to hers and immediately tears started forming in my eyes. the boy i was in love with for as long as i remember, the one who happens to be also my best friend was here.then i remembered hearing about clarke's arresting, i knew that jasper and monty were arrested and it hit me - we're all prisoners who were sent to die.

the people in the back constantly talked about earth and how they can't wait to get there, but the only thing on my mind was how we're going to rip each other apart, if radiation doesn't kill us first.

the trip became much shakier and the kids who were floating in the air just two seconds ago were now draw to the floor thanks to earth's gravity. we're getting closer. the dropship started shaking much harder, out seat belts looked like they could barely hold us and i swear i heart some of prisoners actually pray for their lives. at the moment we hit the ground everything stopped. some of us hit their head, arm or leg. the two of the space walking childs were still laying on the ground faced down and they were not moving. clarke rushed towards them and i prayed that they're just unconscious and that they will be okay, but clarke only confirmed their deaths. the prisoners started gathering around some boy who was dressed as a ark's guard but i think everyone knew jaha wasn't going to send one of his on the death mission. then a dark haired girl approached him and i instantly remembered - blakes. the whole ark was talking about them and how their mother hid her daughter under the floor for the whole sixteen years since having more than one child in the space was illegal. he came down to the earth for his sister, dressed as a guard. i couldn't but wonder what the hell did he do to deserve a place on this ship?

while i was battling with my own thoughts the big doors were opened and the sudden burst of light hit me. octavia, the girl who was hidden, were the first person to actually step on the ground and after she let out a really loud scream "we're back, bitches" people started running around woods. for me, staring was enough. the trees looked even more beautiful and taller than she was reading about, the grass was somehow greener than she expected, and the sky from down here was bright - something i never thought i would be able to see. i turned around only to see clarke and wells standing there, not moving an inch, but the great distance between them was noticeble. clarke found her way to me and without thinking i wrapped my hands around her and for a moment everything felt so right. wells, on the other hand, turned his head away and just passed beside us.

"what's with him?" i couldn't but ask, we once were inseparable and he did actually cared about us, treated us like his family.  i especially cared about him but i always knew he had a thing for clarke, so i promised i'm not going to get our friendship ruined.

"he killed my dad."