Motion Sickness | Simon Petrikov x Reader

Chapter 8 | Talk to Me

Simon had gone home the happiest he had been in a long time. He felt alive again after so many weeks, months, years, even, of feeling dead to himself and the world around him. The evening he just had with you was so magical, he couldn't stop thinking about it. The way you got all dressed up in a cozy fall outfit, how your hair sat on your head, how your gaze was so bright when he was talking with you. Sure, the event itself was fun, but it wouldn't have been the same if you weren't there with him.

Now that he thought about it, that's how everything was lately. He always had a better experience if you were apart of it. There was just something in you that brought out the life in him that had been withering away inside for so, so long. He wanted to scream, he wanted to laugh, and he wanted to cry all at once.

You made him feel something. You made him feel alive.

Simon threw his bag to the side as he walked through his front door. His leaky faucet in the kitchen could've paused in surprise if it was conscious, because the sound of the front door slamming into the wall next to it was the loudest sound to be heard in the apartment building— aside from Simon's beating heart.

He threw himself in his bed, letting out a loud sigh. He wiggled around in celebration, kicking his feet in the air, bouncing up and down before sitting up. His gaze flickered to his nightstand, a portrait of Betty staring right back at him. Suddenly, his heart gently slowed its racing. He blinked slowly a few times before his smile faded into a neutral expression.

Right, Betty. She was long gone, Simon knew that. He knew it all too well now. But that didn't stop his heart from longing for his past partner. It seemed so easy to get past the night before, but this time, he felt an awful guilt set into his chest. He loved Betty with his whole soul. He always would, but moving on was the most difficult thing for Simon to do in this situation.

You made Simon happy, and Betty would want Simon to be happy.

He gently picked up the portrait, sliding out of bed with it in his hands. He walked into his hallway before stopping in the middle of the hall, staring up at the wall.

He hung up the frame.

Betty would always be apart of his life, but he had to welcome in others instead of shutting them out.

He knew how hard it was going to be. He was willing to try for you.

—

You had a wonderful time with Simon. It was the most fun you had since moving to the city, and that was saying a lot considering that you and him were running away from a rat on the sidewalk a week earlier.

You felt happy for short amounts of time, it's not like you were always irritated or upset about something. But, the good feelings never lasted. You would have the times of joy, then you're back to a grossly apathetic state of mind. It was more annoying than anything, really.

You would give anything just to stay happy.

You knew you struggled with intrusive thoughts. Ever since the kitchen knife incident, you went on a search spree online to find out what was wrong with you. You always thought you were insane, thinking of things that you thought could potentially get you locked up in a mental institution somewhere.

Turns out, you weren't alone.

You felt better about it now, but that didn't stop your thoughts from bothering you any less. They were just another inconvenience for you to deal with on a daily basis. Something that made you feel like a horrible person sometimes.

You set your things down, changing into comfortable clothes before going to the kitchen to wash the dishes. The sink had piled up with dirty plates and cups. It was a chore you hadn't been ready to deal with, but now you had no choice— unless you wanted to eat soup with a fork.