the day series

1st Regret

[The Function of Words]

-1st Regret, Kim Doyoung-

What is the function of a series of words?

A simple question that even an elementary school student can answer without much brainpower. However, the meaning of words often changes, adapting to the evolving human thought. Today, I might consider 'missing' to mean 'vanished.' Perhaps tomorrow, the word 'missing' will take on a new meaning, like 'emptiness.'

But the series of words that humans utter serve a definite purpose, which is to communicate with others.

Yoon Jaehyuk excels in using words. He's the teacher's favorite in our school's literature class. Sometimes, Jaehyuk would write beautiful messages and place them randomly in various places. Maybe he just wanted his words to be read.

I found one of them once, in my desk drawer. It was neatly handwritten, with red ink on clean white paper.

When you're asleep, your eyes are closed to the world.

You can't see anything but darkness, which is also cold.

But you can feel a comfort that never dries up. In that moment, you'll grasp something important.

That beauty doesn't always have to be bright and colorful.

I've lost count of how many times I've thought that Jaehyuk must have a reason for all his kindness. Every sentence has a meaning, and Jaehyuk surely wants others to understand the meaning behind the words he carves.

A series of words is always meant for someone else.

I regret. Because I didn't say many words. Especially to Yoon Jaehyuk.

At first, I thought Jaehyuk was kind to everyone so that he'd be praised. So that everyone would owe him and pay him back someday. But today, I realized that Jaehyuk leaves everyone who owes him, without demanding anything for what he did in the past.

I wipe my bruised cheek. Staring blankly at Kim Daeho, who walks away, leaving me leaning helplessly against the back wall of the school. My tears well up. I feel choked, and my entire body aches. But I'm too weak to fight back. Besides, I'm all alone.

"Tomorrow you have to give me your money, Kim Doyoung," Daeho shouts without looking back. Followed by laughter from all his lackeys.

I hold my throbbing arm after being hit with a broken chair leg. There's a little blood seeping through my white school shirt. I grimace in pain.

"It hurts." That's all I can say.

Today, I officially became a victim of oppression again.

Because Yoon Jaehyuk is no longer here. They are targeting me again.

I decided to skip the last class. Besides, I can't go to class in this condition. My school uniform is already dirty and slightly torn. This many bruises will also lead to numerous questions from teachers pretending to care.