"Bella, I don't want you."his words still echoed in her head mercilessly. the way he glared at her, with such hatred and finality. how his golden eyes were darkened. he hadn't been hunting recently. his hair was messier than normal, he'd been running his hands through it. his clothes were wrinkled and stained. he was angry. he was upset.
"Bella, I don't want you."
her heart still clenched and wrenched from the memory. her eyes welled with tears and her throat tightened, but nothing came out. the words she never said fell into oblivion, and the screams rose from the depths of her heartache.
"Bella, I don't want you."
it was cold and jagged, a loss she couldn't imagine nor one could she expect. his name alone, something just thinking about brought heaps of grief along with it, still broke her heart. his absence was so devastating, despite how cold and hard his body was. he was so warm with her, so kind.
"Bella, I don't want you."
why wasn't she enough? why didn't he want her? he was her first everything, first kiss, first love, he was the first person boy who ever looked at her.
"Bella, I don't want you."
she was never a girl someone looked at, she was too plain. pale, short, brown hair and brown eyes. she wasn't particularly too exciting either when it came to personality. she liked reading and staying inside. she enjoyed quiet things, a quiet life.
"Bella, I don't want you."
she wasn't a part of any clubs, and found sport's confusing. so she didn't have many friends, and mostly enjoyed the outdoors from inside.
"Bella, I don't want you."
edward didn't want her. the only boy who could ever like her, didn't want her.
"Bella, I don't want you."
"Bella, I don't want you."
"Bella, I don't want you."
"Bella, I don't want you."
"Bella, I don't want you."
"Bella, I don't want you."bella marie swan was drowning, the cold and harsh hand still grasped her by the lungs squeezing the air out of her body. it pushed her down, further in her chair. time passed slowly and swiftly all at once.
months merged with moments and years blended together with seconds. snow piled and melted in a second just after the leaves fell and molded into moss on the ground.
she was a shell, vacant. she could remember the day he left so clearly. it hadn't left her mind once since.
she remembered how he lifted her over raised roots and pushed low branches upwards for her. she wasn't sure what he'd say, but it was edward, he wouldn't lead her so astray, so deep in the woods without cause.
"Bella, I don't want you."
she was wrong.
so
so
so
wrong.
he walked 3 and a half steps away from her and looked at a smoothed stone covered in moss. it started raining harder, so she pulled her rain hood up.
he told her people were suspicious of carlisle not aging, she didn't bother that he could say he'd had work done. she said she'd go with them, but he didn't want her.
"Bella, I don't want you."
he was breaking up with her, and after, he would leave her. she walked in the direction he went, stumbling and slipping to follow his footsteps.
but he was long gone, and eventually she gave up. if edward didn't want her, then who would?
she decided to lay down and just hope whatever ate her was strong enough to kill her in one go.
*****
samuel uley sighed worriedly. the young swan was only spiraling deeper, he knew he shouldn't have, but he often checked on her during patrols. she looked worse and worse each night. blurry and unfocused eyes, with a permanent look of heartbreak on her face.
sam uley was worried, about a girl who shouldn't have mattered more than a silly human dealing with her first heartbreak.
YOU ARE READING
reaching for her | J.B x B.S
FanfictionJACOB HAS BEEN AGED UP TO 18!! HE IS THE SAME AGE AS BELLA!! jacob loved bella effortlessly, his affection was constant and unwavering. bella, left wounded by edward, didn't realize she had started to open her heart for him. cannon divergence