hidden | clexa

fifty nine

A relieved smile breaks across Lexa's face and she rushes forward to Clarke's bed. Raven makes space for her in an instant. "Heda," she manages. "About the whole bomb thing-"

But the Heda isn't even listening to her. Raven watches her drop to her knees, fuck, what a vulnerable position for the Heda to be in, and then, as if this was some fever dream, she leans in and kisses Clarke. Feverishly, kind of messily, absolutely carelessly.

Abby forgets how to breathe for a second, Octavia is holding back a hysteric squeal.

The Heda is kneeling at Clarke's bed kissing Clarke as Clarke is going into birth.

Holy.

Shit.

"Hi," the Heda whispers then. "I'm sorry, I'm kind of gross, I'm coming straight from war. I washed my hands though, don't worry."

"Gross? There's a fucking baby coming outside of me right now."

Clarke clings to Lexa and pulls her in for another desperate kiss. "Fuck you. Your stupid fucking war left me thinking I'm going to have to this alone. Can't you-" Clarke is interrupted by her own pained groan. "Can't you set priorities?" she pants and Lexa takes Clarke's hand to press a kiss on it, swallowing a grin.

"I did my best."

"It wasn't good enough. Do you- have any idea- how bad I needed you to- massage my fucking feet- because they were the size of bread loaves?"

Lexa laughs and it's infuriating, but it's so beautiful, it's all Clarke needs right now. She looks Lexa into the eyes, so perfect, so warm, so pretty, and she whispers, "But you know what?"

"Hm?"

"I forgive you. And I still love you."

"Thank you. Next time, I'll stay all nine months to massage your feet."

"Next time? You're funny, next time you're going into that cave first and catch any wild magic."

Lexa can't reply before Clarke screams and her body contradicts in pain. Tears run down her temples. "Lexa, I'm going to kill your baby."

"You're killing no one's baby. You're doing such a good job. You can do this."

"Do you wanna switch places for a second?"

"I'm not saying it's easy. I'm saying you can do it. I know you can."

Clarke screams again, a sweat breaking out on her forehead, more tears marking her skin. "I don't want you to leave again," she sobs. "I need you. I need you, Lexa, please don't leave again."

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here." Lexa presses a kiss on Clarke's forehead and holds her close as her body contracts again. "I'm right here, niron. I'm not leaving."

Clarke begins crying harder, melting into Lexa's touch, burying her face in Lexa's neck. "I thought they'd killed you. I always saw you dead on some battlefield, impaled or beheaded and I thought I was going to have to do this alone," she sobs and Lexa holds Clarke tighter.

"It's okay Clarke, I'm here now, nothing is going to happen to me anymore." She kisses Clarke's forehead again and stays rested against it. "I love you, I'm so sorry for leaving you alone with this."

Panickedly, Clarke looks at her. "You're going to leave?"

"No, no, I was talking about the past, I'm here now," Lexa hurries to clarify. "I'm here, Clarke, I'm not leaving. I'm not leaving. I promise."

And Clarke clings onto that promise with her life.

The next hours are a mess of screams, squeezed hands, encouraging comments and tears until eventually, the baby is small and bloody in Abby's hands and Clarke has no energy left, exhausted like she has never been before, laying motionless and safe in Lexa's arms.