Toxic- A Sand And Ray Love Story

Trying

The problem with Sand is that he has always had a saviour complex. He is attracted to those who are broken and need to be fixed, just like his mother. Just like Ray.

Ray was bad for him, Sand knew Ray was bad for him, but somehow, he still loved Ray, perhaps even more than he loved himself. He loved him even if it meant sacrificing his peace of mind. That's just who Sand was. He loved deeply with his all, mind, body, and spirit.

Ray was like his cocaine. He was an addict when it came to that boy, and he took a fix every chance he got. Like now...

Sand stared at Ray, sleeping so peacefully on his bed. He had encountered a very intoxicated Ray last night and like a moth drawn to a flame. Sand was drawn to Ray, and he had to take care of him. He had to save him.

"You are so bad for me." Sand said softly, removing a lock of hair from Ray's face tugging it behind his ear.

Ray has always been the most beautiful person Sand has known. Sand would tell his friends that they didn't understand Ray, Ray was different from Boeing. Ray was like sunshine hidden within the clouds. He was like a wilting flower in need of sunlight and water to be nourished. Ray was like an eclipse. Ray was special. He loved Ray.

Ray fluttered his eyes open, slowly opening them up. Taking in his surroundings and being reminded of the happenings of the previous night.

"Sand?" Ray said, puzzled, his voice hoarse and groggy.

"Hello, Ray." Sand replied, smiling fondly. Sand was hopeless when it came to Ray. That's why he had to move, that's why he had to stay away because he knew he was going to keep coming back. He always did.

If it wasn't for his mother being hospitalised, he wouldn't be here now, lying in bed in front of Ray, looking as effortlessly beautiful as he always did.

"How? Is this really your sand?" Ray asked, trying to stand up, but his head was too heavy, so he laid right back down slowly, closing his eyes.

"Who do you think it could be? You know what you did last night was irresponsible, Ray. Something bad could have really happened. Don't you care about your life, Ray?" Sand scolded, making Ray chuckle.

"Yep, it's definitely you then." Ray said, laughing delighted. Sand was here with him, Sand cared enough to pick him up and bring him to his place just like the first time they met. Sand was here scolding him in the most Sand way possible.

"You think all of this is funny, Ray? Don't you care about anything? " Sand continued his scolding.

"I thought I lost you." Ray said softly, tears falling down his porcelain smooth cheeks.

"Ray??" Sand said concern evident in his voice.

"You left me. You left me and I- I thought I lost you forever. I- I couldn't go on without you, Sand. My life is-"

"Shhhh," Sand engulfed Ray into a big hug. Comforting the boy.

"I couldn't - I can't lose you, Sand." Ray said, sobbing his heart out.

"I was never yours to lose Ray." Sand wanted to say, but he couldn't, not when Ray was clinging to him like this.

"I am here for you, Ray. I always will be." Sand said instead, rubbing soothing circles around Ray's back.

He was there for him, and he would always be there for him. It was inevitable. Ray was like the sun, and he was a sunflower, always seeking him.

"I am sorry, Sand... I am really sorry." Ray said, still sobbing.

"I know you are." Sand said, the tears in his eyes threatening to fall.

Ray was always sorry, even back then, when he always prioritised Mew over him. Even when he went back to alcohol and hooked up with other people, Ray was always sorry. Sand always forgave, giving parts of himself to Ray. He knows he shouldn't, but he is going to anyway.