Hated by You ☆ | Riki Nishimura

第38章

Shattered Mirror

Niki rushed to a bathroom. He stopped in front of a sink and leaned on it. All the words that Mina said lingered in his head. He wasn't mad at her, no. He was mad at himself. Is it actually safe to revolve around Hitomi, for her sake? If he still manages to hurt her sometime? It can not happen. Never. 

Niki unbuttoned his collar and shirt a little to breath properly. He turned the sink on and wiped his face with water. 

It was my fault. All my fault. The problem is within me, I am the problem. Why am I like this? Why the fuck was I born like this? I hate myself. I want to disappear. 

He looked himself from the mirror a while. His hands began to feel the need to do something, to break something. Without a long time of hesitation he punched the reflection of his face in the mirror. The sound of shattering glass echoed in the room, but there was no one else around and no one was within the earshot.

Shards dripped onto the floor and into the sink with a clatter, whilst his knuckles began to bleed. He looked at his hand for a moment, but just let it be. 

-

After the little discussion on the lounge sofa they all went looking for Niki. Mina as well. She had things to apologize. Hitomi remembered that the rooftop was 'Niki's place', but when they checked it, he wasn't there. 

Yuma checked the boys' restrooms while the girls waited outside. He was nowhere in them. But Yuma got an idea that he could have gone to the locker room since it's empty at the moment. And since it's empty, the girls came with Yuma. 

As they entered there, it was quiet and there wasn't no one. For a while they roamed through the locker aisles, but still with no sight of Niki.

"Girls.." Yuma called them while he was checking the bathroom of the locker room. Hitomi looked at Mina in relief. Maybe Yuma found him now? The girls headed to Yuma quickly, but they did not see Niki there. 

Yuma quietly pointed at the sinks. "Could that be his?" He asked slowly. Hitomi turned her gaze there and saw a shattered mirror. Someone had punched it, sure enough. The broken point had blood on it and there were shards on the floor nearby. Hitomi felt her heart dropping. He might be hurt..

​"It wasn't here in the morning." Yuma added.

"Let's keep looking for him." Mina suggested hastily and hitted both their shoulders gently. 

Yuma and Mina left to check all the lounges and cafeteria, while Hitomi began to wander by herself through the corridors. She asked few people, if they had seen him, but no one had. Now she stood in front of the library on the second floor. 

Could he have gone here?

She didn't hesitate much and had the urge to check the library too. It's a quiet place, but she would not think that Niki is there. But just in case. 

The library was empty and there was no one studying at the moment. Hitomi walked through the aisles, one to another, while her footsteps echoing softly. There really wasn't anyone and she started to feel desperate. She yet walked to the last self, already pretty sure he wasn't there. But she froze to her place. There he was, sitting besides the window.

Hitomi took a deep breath and approached him slowly. He didn't seem to see or hear her yet.

When she was close enough, she gently placed her hand on his shoulder to make sure he knew she was there. Niki didn't flinch, but quickly glanced at her direction. He didn't say anything and directed his gaze back to the window. He didn't look sad at all, he looked like he was frustrated and tired.