love with manipulation

Introduction....

                      "Kim namjoon"

I was standing near the traffic signal waiting for my little brother (Kim taehyung) just then something caught my attention... It was a feminine scent and a sudden urge in me to saw her occured and I did...

That was the first time I saw her and probably the last but what caught my attention was her scar. It was on her right cheeks showing she suffered something and healed maybe or not I don't know and unknowingly It was attracting me but why? Maybe a curiosity to know about it. But then I can't know or do something for her which I didn't liked at all. so to distract I saw her eyes and they were sad and a sudden urge in me felt to replace it with happiness which I can't and unknowingly it made me felt helpless.

Then another question came... How her eyes will look probably shinning, probably more pretty and most importantly can I see her smile. How will a smile lingering on her dry lips look. And again how will her dry lips look plumpy and red. But again To see her smile I don't know why I felt like I can do anything but again I can't do anything. Her hands were stuffed in her hoodie that I can't see which made me sad unexpectedly again.

Her face lacked expression. Another question why!? I was lost in myself admiring her that I didn't notice when she disappeared in crowd.

Just like sugar mix in water and I can't  apart her from crowd just like sugar mixed in water. I wanted to go find her unknowingly but I didn't move maybe listened to my brain. That she's stranger and none of my business but till today I regret it so much.

It's been 10 years and unknowingly I am still curious about her. I have questions for her. how she's!? Do her eyes shine now!? Will she be looking more precious while smiling!? Does her face still lack expression!? If not then how she'll look!? Her lips are dry or plumpy now if yes then how they'll look!?

I have unlimited questions for her but no answer. I find it curiosity towards her maybe attraction also but whoever listen to me says it's love at first sight. Then again another question... Is it!?

And again I have no answer maybe or not. It's been 10 years *sigh* I am 28 and maybe she also. It's a guess bcz I never talked to her and again a curiosity in me. How does her voice be like. Will it be like her!? Sad, lack of expression, pretty or something else which obviously I don't know.

Then again what's her name!? Funny right how I don't even know her name still always think about her not from today but from 10 years. Again a question why!? And again with no answer.

But the thing which unknowingly made my heart ache is when they said she must be married or in possibly relationship also. I don't want that unknowingly why!? I don't have answer why!? Maybe I am obsessed!? Or maybe not.

But the thing which made me think about her more is when they said forget her. Then again can I!? I have answer for this only question...

I can't....

Why!? I don't know. Again no answer. My chain of thought broken  due to cars honking. sighing I started my car bcz whenever I see a traffic signal I can't help myself but to think about her and get lost in her. Sometimes I felt like she's my breathe and I can't breathe without thinking about her.

Bcz maybe again that feminine scent is my addiction, obsession, curiousity or maybe something else. I haven't smell that feminine scent and everytime I breathe that will to again smell her scent unknowingly occurs in my heart.

But most important question for me. Isn't among these and surprisingly my prayers are also about her. I think about her all the time but she don't even know my existence funny right but the question I have for her for...

My moon...

Just like moon she have scars but her scars can't hide her beauty. Maybe made her more attractive and that attraction made me addicted, obsessed and what not. But the most important question... Unexpectedly is what I am not only curious about but also want it to happen. Why!? I don't know.

Is she happy!?

The only question which I truly want to know and remove the question and made it happen even if I have to do anything and when I say anything I mean it.

To be continued....

I don't know how was it but let's try... I don't know when will I update next but the question for you is will they meet if yes then how!?