The food experiments

I

Otacon had spent about a week doing research about cooking. He had managed to memorize several recipes from around the world, regardless of how long or complex they were, but he was still failing with the practical part of the process. He had never really been too much of a chef —trough his childhood and early teens he had gotten used to simply eat his parents' handmade food, and right after that he essentially ate precooked food everyday, along with anything that didn't really need any previous work before eating; he was fond of granola & trail mixes, and he even prepared porridge from time to time.

Instant noodles were the most useful to him. They were overwhelmingly practical, they tasted good enough & they made him feel a little bit more connected to his oh so beloved Japanese animations.

The thing is, he did not want to serve such basic foods in front of David... Much less after regretfully convincing him to have an intimate meal together (he had to prepare a whole power-point about why it would improve their trust towards each other, with several unbreakable arguments he... kinda made up or exaggerated).

Well. He didn't regret such a personal victory. He regretted not having put more interest in cooking earlier in his life. But that was not the point. The point is, he almost set the kitchen on fire.

—Otacon? —Snake called him with his barely noticeable worrying voice—. Are you ok? Is everything fine?

—Yeah!!! —he replied, still in a bit of a panicked state—. I, uh... I was doing silly scientific experiments, that's all!!! I should've done them outdoors, you see, but I... I was cold. It's cold outside.

—Well, you must be really hot right now with all that heat and smoke coming from the kitchen —he continued while taking him away from there, visibly doubting what he was told.

—I'm sorry, Snake... —he apologized, expecting to be reprimanded. Otacon was met with just silence, so he felt the need to explain himself further—. I'm sorry. I shouldn't be doing strange things inside your house. Certainly not the ones that could end up damaging or destroying it...

—Otacon, these walls are just wooden logs. We're surrounded by huge trees. I don't think it would be too much of an issue for me to fix them.

—That's not what I meant! I don't want you to do more work than necessary because of my faults...

—Otacon. It's fine. I don't mind.

Hal sighed. He sat on the couch and he was soon met by a couple of Snake's huskies demanding cuddles from him. Snake went back to the kitchen and opened the windows, just enough to get the air flowing but not cool down the house too much. He stood there for a second, observing the snowy landscape.

—So, that dinner of yours...? —David asked, suddenly remembering Hal's 3-hour-long presentation that was still giving him nightmares.

—Don't ask me about it! —he nervously replied, uncapable of thinking of more excuses this quickly—. It will come, as I promised! Just wait for it!

Snake turned to him and looked at his anxious expression. He figured something was going on, but he didn't care enough about Hal's odd experiments to look at whatever it was that was producing all that smoke. He would've caught him quite quickly if he had, but taking care of 50 huskies and a nerd who keeps giving them treats while he thinks he isn't looking keeps his mind occupied more than enough. He doesn't need any more worries.

Several dogs had appeared and they were occupying most of the walkable area. They were trying to understand what happened, making sure to put their noses to work. Some of them tried to call their owner for attention by whining or barking. Or maybe they just wanted to be noisy.

—Enough —ordered Snake, which made all of them go immediately quiet.

Otacon was always astonished by how effortlessly he seemed to manage his dogs' behavior. He continued petting the huskies that were insistent in crushing his skinny body under them. He was hoping Snake would go back to whatever he was doing earlier, so that he could finally relax and maybe watch a film or a show with the dogs. After getting rid of the evidence of his food crimes, that is. David stood there, observing the smoke. He was starting to feel the desire to light a cigarette.

—Snake, weren't you busy a second ago...?

—You know you can call me by my name, don't you? —he answered, looking at the cigarette that was now between his fingers.

—I know...! —he replied—. I'm used to calling you Snake! You call me Otacon all the time!

—Are you mad at me?

—Huh?! —his mouth opened more than usual, quite caught by surprise—. Of course not! I'm just still trying to calm down from the, uh... The experiment! That's all...

Snake looked at him as if he was analyzing all of his movements. It made sense to him that someone like Otacon would have a harder time than him recovering from unexpected events, so he didn't think further about it. He put the cigarette between his lips and left the room as unbothered as he always was.

Hal finally managed to take a deep breath. Or at least as deep as he could with two huskies laying over him. He made an effort to make them move, but they wouldn't. He didn't have enough strength. He promised them a treat for each if they let him get up. They moved. Otacon got up, walked again to the kitchen and fulfilled his promise. He then looked at his food atrocity, still a bit scared it would explode. He got his hand close to it and realized it was no longer hot, so he picked it up and looked through the window to search for a place to hide it from Snake. He thought the dogs would find it too quickly, so, again, he asked the ones closer to him, to help him find a good spot —quietly. And, of course, they'd get a treat for it.

The dogs loved how easy it was for them to get extra food from Hal, so they didn't hesitate and guided him outside to a spot hidden enough not to call too much attention of the others —and if they tried to get closed, they'd make sure to stop them. They wouldn't make this easy job go to waste, after all.

Otacon waited for them to dig a hole, as he was too busy freezing with his clearly-not-warm-enough clothes. One of the huskies took the "food" from him and they buried both under dirt and snow. They even laid some sticks and leafs around to make it less obvious. They barked at Hal to make him know the job was done and they were now expecting their payment.

—Yeah, yeah... —he whispered—. I didn't forget! I'll give you a treat when we get inside... Come on, I'm freezing out here! 

The dogs stopped fooling around with the snow and went indoors with him. They quickly sat down by the kitchen and waited for him to give them their payment.

Otacon sighed. He decided to do more book research before doing any more cooking experiments.