The Assistant from the past

{14} Vic - It's okay right?

Well I am back hope, I didn't break you with the cliff hanger.... enjoy this part

panic attack is being talk about so here is your warning

Is it just me or is the room spinning, nope I think its just me. I feel like im gonna pass out. Am I breathing hard.  

Fuck I don't know but this feeling I really don't like it, I have had this feeling before but not this bad like ever. My thoughts are all over the place why would she say something like that, does she not like me, this is how my ex started before the hitting is she gonna start with me, I'm gonna dead.

And that's the last thought before I passed out for real this time

When my eyes start to flicker open, I can see my Ex's face in front of me; so immediately start to back up so I ended up in a corner, so I have more space to hide my body from him.

It is only when I start to hear a voice saying to will be okay and that I'm safe that I realize that it's not his realized that it was Jaxson I saw when I opened my eyes. I can feel a hand gently rubbing on my leg that's when I know I'm safe and I reopen my eyes and I greeted with Jax's baby blue eyes not Brian's brown ones.

"Hey, there you are" hes says in soft tone

"you passed; than fall off the couch; landed on you bad leg; and hit you head and wrist" it when he says this I staring into my eyes but doesn't make me any less scared from what Stella just said to Jaxson my god I didn't know I hurt this badly

I'm not sure are friendship can over come this.

Okay, that doesn't matter right now you need to think of 5 thing you can feel and then the other parts of that.

Jax's hand on my leg

The pain in my leg – other one

The tear running down my cheek

My back against the wall

My hand pinching my arm

There 5 things I can feel, my therapist would be proud of me right now at least that's one thing I can be happy about right now. I guess I said those out loud and now Jaxson is talking to me about them. I need to snap out of this panic state of mind; I know I'm safe they wont hit me

"I'm sorry I'm so so sorry I didn't mean for this to happened, maybe it would have been better if Brian did kill me so no one had to deal with this aftermath of what he did" is all I have to say once I start talking again

"you know that's not true Victoria no body would be better off without you on the plant, you just need a moment to calm down and I promise you will see that too" jax has to go and say; deep down I know he right but part of me really doesn't want to believe it.

And then I hear the second voice the other person in this apartment say something so quiet I almost couldn't hear it.

"He right you do belong here" Stella says and something else but its to mumble to actually hear fully, but then she says it again this time I heard and so did Jaxson

"I'm sorry for yelling at you and for scaring you butterfly" she says well moving into my line of sight

"Butterfly" Jaxson asks confused as hell that's for sure

"It's a pet name Jax... like you called her Teddy bear earlier" she says right back. This is the dynamic I love maybe all hope isn't lost

"Okay, now that's out the way: you are forgiven I know you were just mad and weren't thinking" I need her to know that

"No but I should have been" "we have been for so long I should have, we have been though so much there was no need for me to out burst the way I have today" stella is telling me like I didn't already know that but I will let her say peace

"well, look at that word fix all problem; you two need to work on that in the future" the bitch rubbing my shin has to say, if I could move I would hit but I cant I'm in to much pain.

As if Ella could tell what I was thinking she goes and hit the back of his head making him look back with a what the hell look.

"well can you guys help me off the floor im stuck" I say with a shit ton of force

"Oh shit" Jaxson says

"Yeah, sorry I didn't think about that" is what he says next moving to get me up

Stella grips one shoulder while Jaxson drab my other one and moved me to the couch where I was original sitting, but this time I get the dog on my lap. I moved so that could prop my leg up on the coffee table; only doing as I was told to do by the doctor when I left the hospital.

"well, we need to talk about what we are going to do with you butterfly" Stella says like I wasn't thinking the same thing

"Jax's already said that are building doesn't have an elevator in it making getting you in and out of the building a major bitch" she saying it matter of factly, which is not totally wrong either like I need to go to work even if my boss is currently sitting in the chair across from me.

"Hey, I have a crazy idea why don't you come to live me I have an elevator that would getting you up easy; we work in the same building; the same floor and last I will need at work the same time as me therefore car pool" Jax speaking to Stella not me like I wont be the one in his house

"Victoria he does have a point" she pause looking at me then back to Jax saying "If you want to take her on then I'm fine with it but I will come check on her twice a week just to be safe you know" telling him almost as if you may hurt like Brian had.

"Okay I don't see a problem with that as long as you bring food one of the 2 days" he add with a flirty smile on his face, he know she would never go for that but tried anyway.

"HEY" I say it louder then I meant to and scared the dog on my lap and there head whip to my direction like I told then I killed someone

"Sorry I said that louder then I meant to but, I never said I wanted to move in with you" they both go to try and say something but I'm faster speaking first. "I know you just want to help but I barely know you on top of that there are so many thing that need to happened before the teo of you go making deals with each other.. okay" I start getting deer in headlight look and I know I have lost them both at some point during what I just said.

"I'm not saying I wont but I also to talk things other you more Jaxs like my dog and some other important details about my life that would matter if I started to live with you"

"I can see where me and Stella started to get a little head strong with you living with me" goes and tell me so politely