[⋆˙🔦⟡] vanessa oneshots

herself

/i'm sorry i wrote this as a vent, kind of? so i'm just projecting myself, apologies for it being badly written

he's gone, and vanessa lets it linger in her mind a little longer. she knows there's no use dwelling on the past, but it's been empty, she misses her cruel, absent, father, she admits it. she knows how he is, knows what he is. but she misses him, her father, not the murderer he was.

but mike's here and everything is better. everything is better, but she misses when it wasn't. she never wants to get over it. it's the only thing she knows, how to feel grief, emotion, sadness- floating around who knows where all alone, occasionally broken by the fact, the realization, that it stings, it hurts to be all alone.

she can do anything she wanted to, she could go home but she doesn't want to. doesn't want to step into the place where she was hurt the most, doesn't want to remember, doesn't want to see what's left behind of him, doesn't want to look back on the things he gave her.