My Life, I Guess (A Memoir)

Prologue

I suppose I should give a disclaimer. This memoir is about the life and times of an Asian trans woman. I'm just telling you right now in case you're transphobic or racist, or most likely both, in which case I'm going to politely ask you to exit out of this story as fast as you can.

I'll give you a sec.

...

Still here?

Alright, now that they're gone... Hi, I'm Mira.

In the time that I'm writing this prologue, it is November 19th, 2023. I'm 27 years old, and I'm a trans woman who has yet to be able to medically transition due to circumstances beyond my control. I like pop music, drag, video games, and writing--despite being bad at it. I'm from Indonesia, and it is currently where I still (unfortunately) reside.

My life isn't particularly special or impactful. I know only very worldly and extraordinary people are traditionally the ones who would write a memoir, listing off all of their achievements in the process. I'm happy for those people, but I'm just about as regular and unremarkable of a person as they come. This book isn't going to have a lot of exciting, heart-stopping recollections. Just musings, opinions, rantings, and reminiscences of certain pivotal points in my life.

I am delusional, though, and that delusion is exactly why I'm writing all of this. The delusion that by writing my life down and publishing it here on Wattpad, it will finally be the one thing I've done that will make an impact in the world. That my existence means something. That I'll be remembered as my real self, not as the non-existent son that my family will remember me to be.

Quite frankly, I'm a little nervous that someone in my family will find this book. I do use some names unchanged, and my story will be very familiar to them. I can only hope none of them spend their time in the non-fiction section on this site.

But yeah, even if this memoir barely makes even a trickle, let alone a wave, I'd be at peace knowing that it's at least out in the open, available to read at your leisure, right here on Beyoncé's internet.

Some trigger warnings I should give: This book mentions mental illness, suicidal ideation, religious trauma, homophobia, transphobia, gender dysphoria, racism and brief mentions of sexual assault. Reader discretion is advised.

Lastly, I know that I will be perceived in very different ways to different people. I acknowledge that I've lived quite a privileged life, all things considered. You, dear reader, might not like me or find me annoying. Hell, you might even end up hating me. But in all honesty, the fact that you care enough to read any of it means the world to me. It means that I made an impression on you, for better or worse, and that's all I can ask for.

Thank you to any of you who read this book. Thank you for acknowledging that I was here.