The next morning I got ready taking a 2 hour long shower blasting music until I was fully ready.
" don't be out long you not grown lil girl " my mama said looking me up and down making me laugh
Donte ended up coming over early in the morning after me and him got into a little arguments.
I stepped outside seeing him waiting outside my door.
" you look good " he complimented me while pulling me towards him by my pants, we gave eachother a kiss and talked for a while resolving our la argument
" I just wanted to see you before I went to my og house, imma come back around 2 so we can go somewhere " he said.
We kissed again before i went back into the house.
I took a nap and ended up waking up around 1, enough time to fix myself up and get ready to leave.
I texted him letting him know I was ready just in case he wanted to come early but he never responded.
I texted again at 2, no response.
Part of me was sad & angry, it was now 7pm and I was wondering rather he was sleeping or not.
For some reason I started crying and changed into some pj's, I called my 3/3 and told them everything
Nuni: so where tf was he at ??
Idk.
Nunu: ian like the nigga in the first place.
Nuni: right he on complete bullshit that's weird.
After hearing them rant on about how fucked up he was I hung up and waiting until tomorrow for school to ask why he never came.
Monday came and he walked past me as if I was a complete stranger to him, my heart dropped everytime I saw him in the hallways but seeing him acknowledge me and still walk pass me made me wanna cry.
But we're not together, right ?
I brushed it off for the rest of the week and returned the same energy but lord knows I would cry myself to sleep every night for 2 weeks straight, I cried to god wondering why I wasn't enough, I sent him paragraphs that he never responded too, i hate that I was so emotional over someone I wasn't even with.
I hate that I was crying over him.
The rest of the few weeks I would write in my notes about how I felt while trying to get over him, part of me wanted to put my pride to the side and force myself to talk to him but my gut feeling was saying fuck him.
Don't let a man tell you twice that he doesn't want you.
School finally came to an end, and I was happy.
2 more years .. I called daryah and let her know everything that happened, we had been talking more ever since because she was going through the same thing with her best friend.
We ranted to eachother all day, Bible studied, and even cried together.
I had to let him go, I wanted to let him go but I couldn't.
As much as I tried he would always be in the back of my mind.
***
Me and daryah was on the phone one day and I was screen sharing my account
" girl why you ain't let chapp in your spam "
I looked at her confused.
" who is chapp ? " I asked.
" the boy right there girl " she said pointing at the account sitting in my request box, I accepted him and went on with showing her something.
" im finna call him hold on " she said, i nodded and hung up.
