Vilify a Violin

Chapter 7

A record of the conversation between E. Gotman and G. Samsa, involves only key information due to limited space. To ensure viewers gain a comprehensive understanding of events mentioned, only the main speaker's parts are remained. In this section, it is Grete Samsa speaking.

*About Childhood*

"May I have a look of your work, what's it called...'Vilify'? I haven't been practicing since my move, but I feel like resuming now. Right. Thank you, I'll do my best, and please forgive my clumsiness."

"The reason began to play violin? ...Nothing special, I think? I was taught how to play violin when I was a child; My parents got me private tutor, and we had class every week, on Sunday afternoon. It became a routine. I was given different pieces, and I practiced during week days. -Yes, I think that's the case. "

"It was very hard to tell whether I had passion in violin as a child. To be honest, even today, I don't think I'm capable to tell why masterpieces become masterpiece, what makes them great, but there's something else, beside violin itself intrigues me...Nevermind. Forget about it."

"...It's nothing of importance, no worries. I'm fine....There's a time, I remembered telling you before, that my family was caught by some problems financially, and I remembered everyone was pretty stressed these days, especially father. He would lock him in his room for hours, smoking and sighing, and sometimes, a quarrel with mother over trivia, which always got settled before they went bed; Another day began, back to the start point of this cycle. Mother was haunted by agitation as well, probably accompanied with a sense of impotence. She sighed a lot as well, and compared to father, tended to be a silent figure. I played violin for them, sometimes after dinner, and it seemed to release their pressure. Yes. That's it. Perhaps I'm more attached to my family than I am to instrument itself."

"I dreamed about going to music school, though it turned out to be almost impossible today. Unlike you, Elly, I'm much an ordinary person. I have neither a faith in freedom nor pursuit in art, but I do wanna learn more. In my subconcious, maybe like you said, I hope to help others with my instrument."

"-Where am I in the story? Sorry, I don't get it. Well, I'm merely not playing violin for others; Of course I enjoy my performance. You see, for both others and I, violin is so far the best outlet of inscrutable feelings. "

*Comments*

"Uh, sorry about the hesitations and hope I did not ruin your piece. You made this structually, well, somewhat, convoluted, so I definately need time to fully comprehend it. I like your piece, though. It sounds...very authentic."

"What others say about my instrument? Well, I barely play to a large group of audience, so I've  recieved few comments on my style. How are you gonna comment my performance then, Elly? As composer. "

"...I see. You mean bewilderment and a sense of insecure, right? Hm, I guess it makes some sense. I don't have a strong personality and ego, and that's why my performance appears to be soulless. Too many things just happened these days, I think I'm indeed too worn out for good music... "

"Appealing? How come? "

*Nightmare*

"I've been having the same dream these days. In the dream I had a brother far older than me, probaby around 30. We together lived in Prague, and um...just like what happened in reality. The only difference is this fictional sibiling. "

"He's nice to me. Everyday when he came back, he would greet me and share funny things happened in his company or even buy snacks on his way home. If I could play violin for him, he would be as happy as nothing. He told me my performance always brought him consolation and relief after a stressed day. Though I was not clear what exactly he did, he was exhausted each time I saw him going back home, so I guess it must be a tense job, something used off people's energy both mentally and physically. Yet he should have a fair salary, since in that dream, I felt like father didn't concern as much as he did in real life about all financial issues, and mother could afford better treatment. He was like...the pillar of the family. He's loyal and dutiful as a family member, and probably, I'd say a perfect brother, despite his silence sometimes. The dream's not very long, but it feels so legit that...as if we've been families for a long time. We knew each other well. "

"-Yes, maybe this part sounds too authentic and ordinary, but what happened next drew it into the genre of nightmare undoubtedly. It was an usual morning, this, my fictional brother, he didn't show up on the breakfast and was about to be late for his work. He had name in the dream, something like 'Gregor'. So Gregor was missing that morning, and what took his place was a gigantic insect! "

"The insect looks horrible. Even now I recalled it, I felt chill raising from my back. It's as big as an adult male, and lied in the bed, waving its tentacles insanely. He produced hissy sound from the mouth-like part as all insect did. Can you imagine it, Elly? Your dearest brother now became a disgusting giant beetle! No communication; No goal; No sympathy...a total monster!"

"Sure...At first we thought it might be Gregor, so we tried our best to protect him and not let his existence be known by the outside world. One day, however, because of omission perhaps, it attacked me when I played violin to a guest. I was scared, and father threw apples to it to banish it. Since that moment I fully realized that Gregor had already died, and all these months we were breeding a cold-blooded wretch who knew little about reciprocating. "

"What did we do to the wretch? Nothing. We didn't kill it, because the next morning we found it stone dead, and we buried it in secret. I was there the day burying the wretch. I saw its body was all wrapped in white thread of some fungus- you know, the way insects are wrapped in cocoon. I didn't know when it would come back and, well, revenge on us until one morning I found my body wrong..."

"I couldn't move; I couldn't make any sounds; My view was twisted; and I heard people walking toward me, a lot of people; These people was dangerous, somehow, but I had no way to escape...*Sigh* Before we moved to Kierling, I'd had the same dream of being trapped every night, and I couldn't stand it anymore...Maybe there is a curse or something like that, I don't know. I also begin to think the reason why Gregor would transform into...something non-human, and I guess it's his personality. "

"Curses, fate, all this kind of stuff usually take advantages of coward or those without a strong ego, so if I wanna be safe...I must take actions. If the curse like Prague, then I'd move to where it could not track, Kierling; If it hated violin, I'll stick to that. Also I'll play it the most powerful piece I've ever heard: I'd play your Vilify to scare it away. "