Vilify a Violin

Chapter 8

Grete Samsa never expected anyone else would move into Kierling within a month, also from cities. The family new, it was said, owned several properties in Berlin, including factories and stores, and the reason coming back was not so different than the Samsa's: visiting relatives; they would stay in Kierling for a while, but not forever. The same for the Samsa, they knew they had to find a way out from this tedious country life and perhaps respire in another city. Yet for both families, one things had to be settled before leaving: marriage.

The Heisenberg's arrival caused commotion in the town. Neighbors seemed more excited than they'd ever been, and the discussion around this family was always heated no matter where they went. The most noticeable figure in the event, undoubtedly, was the youngest boy of Heisenberg, who just graduated from law school in Berlin and aspired to be a senator in the congress. Albert Heisenberg Jr., 25 years old, was a shrewd and ambitious young man; fair skin and slim build, with proper behavior, rendered him great attraction toward unmarried women at the same age as well as their anxious mothers. Engaging with A. Heisenberg Jr would change the fate of the girl herself, but also her family's. Basically all Kierling residents shared this agreement, though not all of them had an exact sense of what life then would be like. Facing such a precious opportunity, concerns and confusions were at once put aside, and time was everything.

Elly Gotman, who once welcomed the Samsa when they first arrived, however, seemed to have little interest and passion in the Heisenberg's visit that she didn't come to see them in person. Her attitude confused some people and ruffled some's nerves, to be specific, her parents, but Grete Samsa clearly understood her and her principles. The purpose showing up was too obvious, and Elly wanted no marriage. Grete, however, happened to have a small talk with that young lad on her way to a restaurant at one corner of the town, and she had to admit that he was indeed likable, but she did not have a strong will to start a relationship with him. She's not hasty to plunge into romantic love, for she was still a young woman rather than a *maiden*. Knowing her destined future, the certainty to be a wife, she would do everything she could to extend her living as a woman and exert all rights she had as woman, including playing violin and pursuing her dream to be a professional.

The selection begins at the end of this month, in Vienna. She remembered what Elly had mentioned in their previous talk. Elly was probably going to be there, but what about her? Would she participate in the selection? She didn't think about that. In fact, since moving out from Prague, Grete had found herself dumb on certain topics, as if something erecting, a sign or a fence invisible, stopped her train of thought. Each time when thinking involved certain topics, her brain shut down automatically. She couldn't feel a thing; blank spreaded in front of her and stuffed the limited room. She failed to do any thinking, so of course she would fail on making decisions. This was indisputable all the time. 

Grete herself, however, was somehow satisfied with this state of inability, when someone else tried to provoke her into thinking. Last time when she described her familial tragedy in the name of a dream, Elly doubted her several times on its authenticity and even asserted Gregor was Grete's elder brother passed away. Though she bursted laughing hearing 'the curse', she did encourage her to follow her inner voice. 

"I agree, " the dirty-orange hair nodded, "Sorry for your brother, Grets; Though I don't believe in any form of 'curse' or 'fate' -whatever you called it- I do believe people should always put themselves at the first place. I appreciate those sacrifice everything, even their true-self to others, but I pity them more...So yeah, fight back with your violin and...you know that gesture, huh? *Bristish solders give French guys 'a flip of the bird'!"

A flip of the bird; butterflies also flip; but moth also flip. She suddenly recalled days ago what she read, about the distinction between moth and butterfly. Is Gregor a moth or a butterfly? What about her? If things went as she feared, the transformation, Gregor may end up being a butterfly since he was harmless and pretty; at least she hoped so. For herself, she obscurely sensed that she might be a moth, for no reason. On top of everything, of course, she would do her best to prevent metamorphosis and what it symbolized. She needed to take action in order to keep full control of herself. To always know what really matters 

"...To always know what really matters to you, Gretchen, " father uttered as she got home, without a context, "You met Heisenberg's son today; your mother told me. So how's it going? Have you planned your date? "

"What?"

Not until she conprehended, her father went on lecturing, "there's one thing your father must teach you: sieze the chance. Then you make smart move. But if you let the chance go because of your indecisiveness, that's the least result we want. I know, young people can be shy sometimes, and especially girls, but still you have to take action..."

"Oh hon', don't put too much stress on our little Gretchen, and you gotta be a little more patient!" chipped in by mother, and she turned to Grete, grinning, "It's me telling your father the thing you talked with little Albert. He is a sweety, isn't he? I originally wanted to tell you about his family party and how you could impress him with your violin the first time you met, but I didn't expect you've talked and got to know each other already! Honestly, I'm so proud of you, my darling! Looks like there's lesser to worry about as your mother. -Like I said, our Gretchen will always be a good girl. -Oh, how dumb I am! almost forget: I found a dress matches you perfectly this morning. You must try it on..."

Mother stroke her hair gently and didn't forget to pat on her shoulder to show her excitement, and Grete said nothing but smiled. She wasn't sure if she's smiling. Her lips curled up, but she didn't know what it was. 

She smiled for a very long time that she forgot its beginning, as if she's born with such a smiling face. When she got bed, she was still smiling. 

Then she heard strong tapps on her window.

*the gesture 'fip of bird', namely giving someone one's mid finger was firstly invented by British solders, as a variation of the gesture holding bow and arrow to show despise to their enemy, French during Anglo-French Wars