He didn't wait to see if I would follow before striding away with the expectation that I would. I chased after him despite wanting to dive back into the bed to cover my head with the sheets and hope to wake up on my shitty old mattress with the scent of mildew that always lingered in my room filling my nose. I would be lying if I said I didn't wish for the same thing every time I closed my eyes at the end of the day. I would trade this nightmare for the one that awaited me back home in a blink.
I would trade everything I had for Ash.
But he wasn't here and I needed to find my way back to him. That wouldn't happen locked inside castle walls. Unless...
My eyes darted to Rowan's neck, searching. My heart sank when I failed to catch a glimpse of his portal key or the chain that held it around his neck. If he wasn't wearing it... my eyes began to dart around the sitting room for possible locations it could be hidden in. There weren't any that jumped out save for a few drawers in the furniture scattered around the room. But... why would he hide it out here even if this room was one of his private rooms? My eyes drifted over to the closed and drawn French doors that led to his room. If I was going to find it, it would be somewhere in there.
"Can I use the bathroom first?" I asked Rowan's back as he continued toward the door leading out into the hall. I didn't balk as much at the thought of him watching me pee when it could get me closer to what I wanted most, a way back to Ash.
"No," he said without sparing me a glance. "You can relive yourself once we've finished with the Queen."
I bristled at his response, glad that the pressure I felt against my bladder wasn't bad enough to warrant arguing. If it had been, I would have asked before changing in hopes of possibly escaping his eye. Currently, it wasn't worth the risk that he would follow through on watching me perform my bodily functions to maintain a thoroughly punishing eye on me. For a split second, the thought of pissing myself to prove a petty point popped into my head, but disgust made it fleeting. I wasn't unhinged enough to piss myself to piss off an asshole. Especially since he had already proven that his ire came with a bite of pain.
As I followed behind him, I took in the smooth and trained ease of his silent steps and his straight posture that tried to come off as relaxed to hide the stiffness in his shoulders. It seemed he couldn't hide the discomfort of the perpetual stick he had up his ass that made him stand so straight and tall.
"What's this meeting about?" I asked as we reached the doors at the end of the hallway that separated the King's wing from the rest of the castle.
"Getting answers." He answered, flicking two fingers through the air at his side. A breeze rustled my hair, reminding me of the nest it must have been as the doors swung open as we neared. "She wants to know what you know."
"I already told General Amrod everything," I argued while smoothing my unruly locks down. "I don't know why I was brought here." That's what he had been most interested in finding out.
"It doesn't matter. The Queen already has her theories. You're just here to entertain her until she settles on one and decides what comes next."
I didn't like being referred to as someone's entertainment, but I was too worried about the disconcerting possibilities of what my future could hold to linger on it for long. "And what would that be?"
As we continued down the hallway towards the stairs, Rowan let out a breath that could have possibly been a laugh. "I stopped trying to predict the Queen's next move long ago."
"Couldn't get it right?"
"I lacked the cruelty that is required to understand how her mind works."
I didn't share the nonchalance that he spoke the words with. They triggered a tremble I had to clench my fists to hide.
