map on your face | summerz

VI

Chaewon catches sight of Kazuha's left hand balled into a fist on the table as she eats with her right, not looking up from her bowl once.

Is it bad that she thinks Kazuha looks good like this?

With her eyebrows furrowed and veins in her hands bulged, eyes cold and angry. It's strange to Chaewon, how Kazuha can look so effortlessly attractive doing anything, it bothers her, she can't help but steal glances every few minutes.

If Chaewon's being honest, she didn't quite know who was texting Kazuha in the kitchen this morning, although she'd looked so clearly at the younger girl's phone screen, which she's ashamed of, she honestly doesn't know why she did that. She already knows that Kazuha has the language settings on her phone set to Japanese, it's only natural, but she was even more surprised to see the texts written in Japanese too. She shouldn't have been surprised, Tsuki and Kazuha are both Japanese natives, of course they'd text in their mother tongue, how stupid can Chaewon get? She's mortified and unbelievably embarrassed. Not to mention the fact that Chaewon thinks highly of herself in the sense that she respects people's privacy, isn't that why this is all happening in the first place? She's respecting Kazuha's wishes for space and distance, that is what she's doing, but there's moments like this morning and last night that make her break, little subtle moments that barely last ten seconds. Little moments in which she can never seem to control her emotions, the temptation, the urge. So no, she wasn't able to read or understand any of the foreign letters and words, which was a rather embarrassing experience on her part. If she decided to look she should've at least been able to read what was being said. So she did the only thing she thought of in that moment, which was leaving in a hurry and hiding.

But then again everything seems to always follow her. And it did. Into the living room she purposely chose to sit in the corner, to avoid Kazuha's line of sight and to go unnoticed. To mind her own business, which she had clearly failed to do minutes earlier. To pray for Kazuha to leave and return to her own dorm downstairs.

But then Kazuha walked into the living room, apple seemingly abandoned and replaced by her phone, which she stared at with a subtle smile. And then Chaewon had to sit through an awful conversation of Sakura explaining about gay idols and confirming that Tsuki was the one texting Kazuha. The discomfort settling in that Tsuki is who Kazuha was texting this entire week, who knows how close they are? Who knows what they talk about, what they have in common, do they like each other? Tsuki's pretty. Kazuha's prettier. Chaewon doesn't know what to think, her mind already painting images of Tsuki sleeping over and having to third wheel.

And if Chaewon's to put it quite frankly, Sakura's strange point isn't entirely wrong. Even as she sits at the dining table now, she thinks that Sakura's explanation is probably the reasoning behind her kissing Kazuha so suddenly. She's surrounded by pretty girls, and suddenly after four years it's finally gotten to her, causing her to act out? It sounds weird, even Chaewon knows, but she needs to put a reason to the kiss, any reason, and this is the closest she's gotten to one.

And of course, Tsuki was brought up again at the dining table mere moments ago. Chaewon doesn't understand Kazuha, she doesn't understand why she's angry, it's true that Tsuki could like her. Kazuha's pretty, she's funny, she's athletic, she's kind, and above all they have something in common, being foreigners from the same city struggling to learn the same language.

And Chaewon swallows as she remembers the way Tsuki had her hands all over Kazuha at Show Champion, she doesn't even want to know what's going to happen next week, they might just start kissing in the dressing rooms, maybe Tsuki will even get down on one knee.

Kazuha picks up her bowl, taking everyone else's empty bowls with her jaw clenched, because of course as angry as she is, she can never be ill-mannered. Chaewon stares at the wall for a moment, if anyone's to talk to Kazuha right now it's only natural it be her. As much as Kazuha doesn't like her, she's the leader and she feels a sense of responsibility to look out for her, to help her.