Chicken for the Heart

Chapter Four - The Urge To Pee While Running

Dedicated to Lamisa :)

__________________________

Chapter 4

I. Hate. Running.

For some people, running is a hobby. For others, it’s a way to get fit. But for me, it’s a way to possibly end up in the hospital, and I’m not kidding.

We’re up to level 2 and my lungs feel heavy like bricks. My whole body is sticky with sweat and I swear my face is red from me panting like a dog high on drugs. My skinny jeans feel awfully like I’ve just taken a piss in them, reminding me that I should’ve changed into my PE clothes instead of chatting with Kara in the change rooms.

I make it to end of the gym and quickly turn around just as the audio yells “BEEP!” followed by “LEVEL 2, 5!”

“Kara, I’m dying!” I plead melodramatically when I see she’s just in front of me. In times like these, I wish I could be as physically talented as my best friend. She’s running so casually and so calmly as if she’s just started. She hasn’t even broken into a sweat yet.

“You can do this Sunny! Try getting distracted or something and get up to at least level 6,” Kara yells back just as we turn around and start a next level.

“Okay…” I wheeze out before hearing Mr Stanley yell at some girl, “Miss Laura Franklin! You’re out! Well done but you didn’t get to level 6 so detention after school.”

What the fudge? We get detention if we don’t get to level 6?! This is prosperous!

Or is it preposterous? Oh whatever…

Poor Laura, she’s overweight and has asthma, but at least that was her excuse.

I truly hate Mr Stanley, I think with a grimace. That guy was insane. I bet he wasn’t even a real PE teacher. I’ve never actually seen him do anything relating to sport, well besides bossing us around with his big duck mouth. And why isn’t he doing the beep test? That son of a bum!

Hehe… bum! This word is even better than ‘toilet’. If only Mr Stanley’s name was ‘Mr Bum’. In fact, I’ve always wanted a teacher called–

“Miss Jones!”

Speak of the bum and he shall appear, I think with a lopsided grin while ignoring the Bum teacher.

As I wipe another trickle of unpleasant sweat from my face, I hear the sounds of the boys’ jeers, my huffs (of pain) and the sound of a familiar song…

“MISS JONES!”

“I’m running! I’m running!” I yell back as I feel something vibrate. Although, I don’t pay any attention to it as level 4 has finished. I swear I’m about to die any second with the increasing speeds.

I quickly turn my head to face Mr Stanley who’s giving me a disapproving look. “I know you’re running, but your phone is ringing!” he shouts at me.

Oh. So that’s what was vibrating! As I come back into my senses I hear the oh-so-familiar song – coming from the sweaty pocket of my jeans.

“Oh I’m a gummy bear! Yes I’m a gummy bear! Oh I’m a yummy tummy funny lucky gummy bear!”

What? It makes a good ringtone. Although, I think I’ve managed to catch a lot of people’s attention now.

“That ringtone was sooo like last year!” Tracy, the cheerleading captain screeches in my ear while running past me with her other cheerleader friends. I just ignore her and take my phone out. As I can’t take the call and level 5 has started, I throw my phone across the gym hoping it won’t break.