°•The Night I Lost Us•°

-AKITOS POV-

This is it.
He's dead.

His last words haunt me everyday.

'I'm sorry.'

I forgive you, Toya.
I should've been the one apologising though, not you.
It was never your fault.
I would've done the same if I was in your shoes.

The scene of him going limp in my arms flashes briefly across my mind everytime I think of him.
I can't remember any of the happy memories we had together anymore.
All I can think of was his death.

He died in my arms.
I'm sorta glad about it to be honest.
At least I was with him throughout.

I got to be the one who would hear his final words.
I can't even sleep peacefully anymore though.
Not without waking up in a cold sweat.

I look through my phone at all the pictures we took, the memories we made,
Together.
But now, I have to make new ones.
On my own.
Not together anymore.

Everyone's been really worried for me since his funeral.
I don't blame them, but I don't want them to worry over me.
Even if I lock myself in my room the entire day, and don't eat anything, I don't need to be worried about.
I just wanna be alone.
So I can dissappear...

I cant live without him, he was always there for me.
When I was upset about RAD WEEKEND, everytime I doubted myself, everytime I'd ever struggled... he was there....
He was a constant.
But now he's not.

I'm not used to not having him beside me.
I'm not used to him not picking up my calls or reading my texts.
Even though he's gone, I'd still text him.

But the texts turned green recently, so I can't anymore.

I miss him so much...
I can't find a new singing partner, he was the only person who could be it.
He's the only person I sound good with..

But we can't sing together anymore, not like this..

........
What do I do now?

-TSUKASAS POV-

I failed to make him smile..
Instead, all I did was make him suffer..
Our younger brother...
Even if we weren't related, we still saw eachother as siblings...
We all did.

Me and Saki have been crying for days, we miss him so much.
He can't see me become a star, and he won't see Saki go pro.

Worst of all, he won't see Vivid BAD SQUAD surpass RAD WEEKEND.
He won't see Akito surpass RAD WEEKEND..
And he couldn't even fulfill his dream..
Poor Toya.

He didn't deserve to die, not like that.
When we all heard of the way he did it, we were horrified.
It's a brutal way to go out.
I never thought he'd prefer that over living, but I guess that's our fault.