(The whole gang is helping Alice mail out resumes while whistling the theme from The Bridge on the River Kwai.)
Jack: Uh, Ali, we're running low on résumés over here.
Natasha: Do you really want a job with Popular Mechanics?
Clint: Well, if you're gonna work for mechanics, those are the ones to work for.
Alice: Hey, look, you guys, I'm going for anything here, OK? I cannot be a waitress anymore, I mean it. I'm sick of the lousy tips, I'm sick of being called 'Excuse me...'
(Carol is licking an envelope)
Carol: Ow-Ow paper cut, paper cut.
Peter: (hands her a class of juice) Here, here, here.
Carol: (in pain) Grapefruit juice, grapefruit juice!
Alice: Ok you guys, we are almost done. We've only got 20 more to go.
Jack: Ali, did you proofread these?
Alice: Uh... yeah, why?
Jack: Uh, nothing, I'm sure they'll be impressed with your excellent compuper skills.
Alice: (upset) Oh my Goood! Oh, do you think it's on all of them?
Peter: Oh no, I'm sure the Xerox machine caught a few.
(The gang starts whistling the song again and working backwards with them unpacking the envelopes and Jack crumbling one of the résumés.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Jack and Clint are sitting at a table. Alice is working.]
Clint: You know, I know they call this a Love Seat, but I'm not really feeling anything special towards you.
(Jack rolls up his newspaper and hits Clint on the head.)
[Natasha and Carol enter.]
Natasha: Hey, guys.
Clint and Jack: Hey.
Alice: Hey... hi, ladies... uh, can I get you anything? (to Natasha, quietly): Did you bring the mail?
Natasha: Lots of responses.
Alice: (to Natasha): Really? (out loud): Sure, we have scones left! (to Natasha): OK, read them to me.
Carol: (reading): Dear Ms. Warren, thank you for your inquiry, however... oh... (crumples up letter)
Alice: (out loud): We have apple cinnamon...
Natasha: (reading): OK... Dear Ms. Warren... yeah... yeah... yeah... No. (crumpes up letter)
Carol: Wow!
Alice: What?
Carol: (reading): Your Visa bill is huge!
Alice: (grabs the bill) Give me that!
(Camera cuts to Clint and Jack at table.)
Clint: You know, I can't believe you. Linda is so great! Why won't you go out with her again?
Jack: I don't know.
Clint: Is this still about her whole 'The Flintstones could've really happened' thing?
Jack: No, it's not just that. It's just—I want someone who... who does something for me, y'know? Who gets my heart pounding, who... who makes me, uh... (begins to stare lovingly at Rachel)
YOU ARE READING
𝑭.𝑹.𝑰.𝑬.𝑵.𝑫.𝑺. (Jack x Alice/side Natasha x Clint)
Fanfic6 friends who go through just about every life experience imaginable together; love, marriage, divorce, children, heartbreaks, fights, new jobs and job losses and all sorts of drama. Dedicated in memory of James Michael Tyler for his role as Gunter...
