The Moon Will Sing

Chapter 8: Crybaby

She didn't know why she felt so weak. First she thought she could blame Niragi for all her problems, but she somehow knew it would end up backfiring. So now she blamed the Gods, but she knew that wasn't right either.
She had only herself to blame for her weakness. Her heart and the love it held, although a blessing, was also a curse. It made her worry about someone other than herself and that wasn't something she was used to. She never had to care for anyone else, she never felt loved and she had never loved anyone. Until he came along.
Shuntaro Chishiya was complicated, he was cold, he was cunning, he was-
He's the love of her life.
Love, she decided, was a weakness. It was all fucked up.
"Why are you crying?"
She hadn't even noticed that Chishiya was talking to her; she sighed and that seemed to be enough for him.
But he still asked "what happened?"
"Spade," Usagi mumbled as she tried to ignore the beating heart that she wanted to break, "I'm gonna take a walk."
As she clutched her chest, stumbling over her own footsteps, Usagi wanted to disappear more and more.
God, what is wrong with me?
She observed, analyzed, and reacted to everything around her. Her dull and devoid reactions would have worried Chishiya, had he followed her.
He doesn't care enough...
Usagi looked at the couple that resembled her and her lover the most. The businessman and the loving yet gullible woman. She flinched at the sight; is this how I look with-
Chishiya stared blankly at Usagi; for the first time in years, his mind was all noise, nothing he understood.
What was happening to them?
Something must be in the air, or maybe the stress was getting to them. Whatever it was, it needed to stop.
Stop fucking with destiny.
Usagi felt the tears fall down her cheek, and nothing she did to quiet the cries of her soul helped. She choked up trying to fix her emotions. Fix. What was there to fix? She was only human.
"Fuckin-"
Usagi grumbled curses, hoping to find a place where nobody would bother her; in other words, she had nowhere to go.
She could feel all eyes on her; she was suffocating.