Meri Zubani (1)

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Namaste!Sasriyakal!Aslahmalikum!

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Namaste!
Sasriyakal!
Aslahmalikum!

Hello Everybody!
This is shakhixdevir_world and saakk_editz inshort Bb

Before u go further in this...
Just wanna to clear that it's not a story or ff!

Have just opened this to pour my heart over here as nowadays I'm feeling so low or can say broken but how badly I wanna to be...........?!

I itself don't know!

I want somebody besides me not physically but the one who can be myside without presenting!

I wanna to be overwhelme but wasn't able to find happiness anywhere and at this hour of night suddenly this thought!

Thought to share whatever I feel by writing nd guess what?!

Yesss!!

It's indeed a better way coz if u feel that u want to share something with someone nd that particular isn't even getting hint then what?!....it feels more worst

If u wanna to be feel lighten can ~ cry, shout, tore pillows nd cushions furr nd fabric but  but but!

tore pillows nd cushions furr nd fabric ~ Plz don't do this ever cos if u'll do then maybe it'll creat a big ruscus called a punishment by parents

So again this isn't a good solution but finally I got the answer that's writing!

Yess!!!

Writing ~ to write whatever I feel whether its an overwhelming feeling, broken, discouragement or neutral but again an issue!

Issue!!!

Urghhhhhhhh.......!!

Nd see here goes the issues list

No. 1 → If I'll write something in my then that can be cought by anyone nd then will feel embarassed but why?!

Why should I feel that?!

Answer will be only the 1 that u can think positive as much u can....Bhai meri apni baat h koi mujhe q judge krega!!

But alas when that happen it automatically converts into....!!!

No. 2 → If will write something in my own phone or a digital notepad that will to definitely creat something unexpected

Nd sooooo on!

But still it's indeed a better way

Wanna know how?!

Aree it's very simple

By saying indirectly!

Still didn't understand?!

Hufff.... Ohkay so

I mean by writing poetry, by stating facts

Nd if are not a poeter then also not a big issue as there can be  several problems

1 , 2, 3, 3....

100, 1000, 10000,......

But also there's always 1 solution too

Nd I got my answer

So those who wanna to feel lighten with me can stay here nd the rest of them plz walk out

________________________________________________________________


I've so many friends, close friends
even some of them used to say that I'm her sister nd eventually I actually started feeling that yes they aren't just saying this but they mean it too but I was wrong as whenever I needed them they always had some excuses like sometimes used to say ~ abhi nind aa rhi h kl baat krte h, busy hu, mood off h, abhi possible nhi h, jo bhi h kl dekhte h or baad mein dekhte h, etc.

but that tomorrow never came even I say infront of them that I wanna to say something important then also.....

That hurts!

It's really hurts so bad

Nd this hurt nd loneliness leads me today towards the end of my FPs

Yes here me loud nd clear

Today I've closed all my professional ACC's on Ig which I created for DeVir even my personal I'd

Still present on X corp but just for the last trend of the year which is gonna be for 3 years of Saakk

Still present on thread but I hadn't have thag app now nd I won't try ever try to get that back!

Still present on tele nd knows very that bot today maybe,
not tomorrow maybe,
not so soon but definitely I'm gonna receive a msg but ik that very well that'll be for just a formality nd then I also won't hesitate in doing just a Lil bit of formality

Ik I'm gonna receive a msg from here 1 writer too (my namesaked sis maybe from here side nd my favourite in reality) may not in upcoming 10 days, 1 month or bot so soon but definitely I'm gonna get it nd after checking that I'm ignore it too nd then she'll be quite after checking that bot responding nd rest will be the same not a single info whether a particular is alive or ......

Nd That's the only reason that I wants to pour my heart here in some different manner as feeling broken

But soon will be okay I'm sure!


_______________________________________________________________

I lie awake tonight,
Wishing of things I can change.....
I try to convince myself,
But it's all so strange......

Is it me,
Or is it you?
Do I try,
Or are we through?

So long we've shared
Just to walk away.....
But so much hurt
To want to stay....

______________________________________________________________

Signing off
~Bb

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