A cry from a young boy sounds through the walls of the bright room.
My head rocks slightly and my leg jiggles vigorously. I'm a bit restless today.
The office is a bit behind at the moment, about an hour.
If I had known the wait would be so strenuous I would have brought something to do.
An image moves across the glass wall from the hallway. The glass is distorted so I only see the silhouette. A dark color. It moves quickly.
Make him leave I think to myself.
Without reply the figure stops at the door way and instead a small women and her rosy cheeked little girl dressed in pink enter.
I notice my heart rate has risen significantly and breath slowly to calm it.
The little girl looks sad, she sniffles and itches her nose. The mother whimpers and pulls her baby close.
I look to my mother distant beside me.
That's my fault. My mother was never the loving type but I don't help the matter.
I'm just generally not a people person.
My face feels numb. When I speak it moves very little. I'm told I look sad often, but I'm usually not.
My face just has no character. Like its a mask. Flat lipped and empty eyed.
I check my phone for its zero notifications.
The way I like it.
Talking to people is just a bother.
It's been about 20 minutes and I think I'm loosing my mind.
I glance blankly up at the tv at the other end of the room as a last resort to occupy myself.
I hate this room. I feel like if I have to sit here another second I'll explode.
The TV plays an awareness commercial on strokes and heart disease. How depressing. Just the thing you need in a place like this.
More reason for it to be even more agonizing.
What a dreary setting, suddenly this room doesn't seem so bright, and it seems to shrink down to double the size in which it was before.
My neck cracks and it startles me awake.
I decided to work on some of my writing when a young tall man walked through the door. I checked my mothers face to confirm if he was really there or not.
Her grin told me he was.
He held a small baby girl, with short blonde hair. He was patting her back lightly as he hummed to her. He sat for a bit then noticing his babies restlessness, stood and let the baby walk to her hearts content, grasping tightly to her fathers fingertips.
It pained me to think of how she could turn out. So cute and innocent. She reminded me a lot of myself. The short blonde ringlets, pale skin, and bright blue eyes.
Soon the father sat and let the baby roam. Later I learned Layla was her name. Her father sat tiredly watching his baby crawl with his hands dangling between his legs.
With my mothers soft giggles I could tell this baby reminded her of me too.
Finally they called us in, only an hour late, as planned. They lead me to my room, number 10, first on the left.
The nurse, she spoke softly, I know I frightened her. I've had this nurse before but she spoke differently than usual.
Well she knows what I'm here for that explains it enough.
"Just the Prozac you're on right now, right?"
I nod.
"Okay, any allergies?"
I shrug and look at my mother, she says no.
And now we wait again. I glance around the small room composed of only a desk, a bed and two chairs, and a few children's books in a cabinet. Making the room feel very crowded for such a small space.
There is only one escape route and that's through the same door in which trouble would be coming from.
The last time I was here, I was ambushed, smoke came seeping into the room through vents, I had to keep calm and breath as little as I could. I saw the way that doctor looked at me, those eyes. They were not those of a person, I just know it.
